text_1: A list compiles Andy Rooney's wry observations on a variety of topics.
text_2: So, to whom should this be properly attributed? Although we might swear that at least of few of these items are things we’ve heard Andy Rooney say, this isn’t his work. Nor is it the work of humorist George Carlin (another personality commonly given credit for political humor of uncertain origin), to whom these witticisms are also often attributed. Everything here (except the first two jokes) springs from the creative mind of comedian Sean Morey, who has performed all of these bits during several appearances on the Tonight Show and in radio and live shows across the U.S.