-----
--- 2430084
What would you do to fend off fatties seated next to you?

I was thinking of:
- put the armrest down and just say no if a fatty asks to put it up. Have them call a FA. Only works when you are on the window or middle seat
- force the armrest down with no regards to how much it hurts the fatty
- force down the tray with no regards to push fat away
- pretend to go to the toilet and mention to a FA that you cannot put your armrest down and you feel unsafe. Prepare to show the FA the airlines guidelines.

I have seen a fellow fitizen suffer from a really obese woman on my last flight and I fear I may be next up.
--- 2430091
Bluetooth headset on. Armrest, down. If they or their body touches me I call a flight attendant and explain this person keeps touching me without my consent, and I want it to stop. If they do it again I ask for an air marshal and explain I'm pressing charges when we land.

I do not interact with the fatty at all. I do not say anything to them that may imply I consent for their bulk to touch or rest on me. I bypass fatty excuses and go straight to authority.

It has worked twice nice, once with amazing success (fatty was removed from aircraft before flight because no room to put him somewhere else).

>don't touch me
>I said stop touching me 
>(insert "I can't help it" / "sorry" here
>excuse me miss this person won't stop touching me even though I asked them not to, can I move?
>if I can't move then can they move?
>if they touch me again I'm going to consider it assault and press charges, can I count on you for a witness statement?

Just be a cunt about it. Fatties don't deserve human rights so treat them like they don't exist and are simply an obstacle.
--- 2430096
>>2430091
>dont touch me
holy shit, thats a great strategy, thank you. So once the fatty got removed, what happened in your other success? Did you just get a new seat? What if the plane is full though.
--- 2430102
>>2430084 (OP)
I don't fly economy because I'm not a poor 4chan chud, I've made it out the virtual ghetto and niggas love to hate
--- 2430245
>>2430091
that is fucking brilliant!
--- 2430286
>>2430091
You sound like an absolute faggot. No, scratch that. You are an absolute faggot. This is like calling the cops over trespassing because there are kids on your front lawn. Man the fuck up.
--- 2430322
>>2430286
>fatty spills over to your seat
>fatty has no regard for others that resulted form the fatties decisions
>"man up and enable the fatty"
how is it our fault if a fatty cant stop eating 24/7. Fatties spilling over only happens if you are really obese so you have to been eating non stop for years to get there.
--- 2430324
>>2430322
The fatties I've been around on planes have been more mannered and respectful than the the showerless teenage druggies. They most often don't smell because of how much cologne they've put on, and are more willing to accept their faults because of their apparent size. Some of the most enjoyable conversations I've had on planes have been with fatties.
--- 2430325
>>2430324
>most often don't smell because of how much cologne they've put on

>don't smell
>how much cologne they've put on
the americanest shit.
--- 2430335
>>2430324
sounds cool and all, except for the fact you are being crushed by some obese fatty the whole flight. At least with smelly druggies I can put on a facemask or something to filter the smell.
--- 2430336
>>2430335
They weren't that big.
--- 2430372
>>2430322
>you have to been eating non stop for years to get there
Yes, which is why these people are awful to be around. It's not just that they're fat, but they usually have shitty borderline personality traits, poor impulse control, poor hygiene and will bring their own sloppy food where they go. I'm not talking about someone who is a little heavy but 300+ pounders.
--- 2430376
>>2430336
for you
--- 2430382
>>2430084 (OP)
im too tall to touch the armrests when seated upright anyway
--- 2430549
>>2430084 (OP)
Fatfuck >>>>> sitting next to a stinky pajeet that stares at you
--- 2430576
>>2430091

you have literally never done this.
--- 2430580
>>2430286
No, the faggot is the fat fuck who didn't buy two seats and thought he could rest his fat on another person for a 6 hour flight. 

Kill yourself, fat fuck. I will not "man the fuck up" to deal with YOUR obesity. I will have you charged with assault if you touch me without my consent, period.
--- 2430582
>>2430576
I have. I fly all the time for business and have several encounters with obese passengers. I tell them to stop touching me m, and if they don't stop touching me, then it's game on.

Just because somebody is physically large doesn't mean they are allowed to touch you.
--- 2430604
>Fly Southwest
>Pay the extra $40 for A1-A15 boarding
>First 30 passengers all pick their window or aisle seats that they wanted
>Rest of A, then B, then C boards
>The D people then shuffle on. These are the retards that only check in upon arrival at the ticket counter. Almost always obese.
>D person sits between you and the other A1-A30 passenger, thus negating many of the benefits of boarding first

Such is the duality of early boarding.
--- 2430627
>>2430604
>not being that chad that shows up at the last possible second on MDMA from the club you left an hour before your flight was scheduled to leave and gets a cart ride to the gate, where they are keeping the plane open specifically for you, and making everyone else late
Ngmi
--- 2430631
>>2430084 (OP)
Personally I think society should adjust a bit more for the overweight.
--- 2430669
>>2430631
Yeah, by turning them into a newer version of whale oil
>>2430627
>show up high on mdma for flight
>make it a point to sit in between two ham beasts
>physical touch endorphins through the roof the entire trip as their bulbous rolls vibrate against you
--- 2430671
>>2430669
Too bad you'd fall in love with them or that would be a god tier plan
--- 2430694
>>2430631
Overweight people already fit in the seats with armrests down, Obese ones do not
--- 2430697
>>2430580
You can try, nigga.
I'm a 6ft5 monster of decadence and believe me when I say that I will gaslight the fuck out of the attendants whenever they arrive. If need be, i will pretext that i need to take a wicked shit (as is my prerogative, no one will doubt my giant self), And this circus will only have to last until we take off, nigga. 

You WILL enjoy the next 6 hours unless you can convince the flight attendants to upgrade me, i'm not moving anywhere and I will touch you so hard the pope will ask me to become his cardinal.
--- 2430698
>>2430669
You forgot the part when you try to convince the two fatties to threesome you and the shame afterwards
--- 2430756
> larp thread
none of you autist fuckers will ever do this
you'll sit there quietly seething for 8 hours then ragepost for weeks on a Bulgarian earthenware forum
--- 2430763
>>2430084 (OP)
okay this thread is based
--- 2430765
>>2430091
things that never happened but made me kek either way
--- 2430777
>>2430697
How do you shit on a plane? Open the door and aim from the aisle?
--- 2430797
>>2430756
I have low standards for flying, but some fatty crushing my body is something I will defend with vigilance. Dont care if some zoomer puts it on tiktok. If someone calls me fatphobic I will ask that person if they wish to switch seats with me, gonna shut him up alright. If the attendants do nothing, I will just force my armrest down until the fatty screams, not my problem its safety after all.
May I go down as the most hated obnoxious person on the plane, but at least I wont have my first days ruined by a sore body.
--- 2430804
>>2430797
you'll go full black lady is what you're saying?
--- 2430849
>>2430804
whatever you want to call it, i dont care. Why should I not speak up when I dont get what I paid for and my literal health is at danger.
--- 2430875
>>2430091
Holy based, to the point of a fat nigger ITT seething
--- 2430909
>>2430580
I get not wanting to deal with fatties but cops, be they local or federal, are not going to do a goddamn thing. American cops aren't showing up for actual crimes anymore, let alone made up ones. Just having a fat person's arm touch you might technically be construed as assault but no prosecutor is going bother and will tell you to gtfo. I'd laugh if you got charged with making a false report and being put on an airlines "problem customer list" and having them refuse to sell you tickets in the future. You might get a stewardess who just wants to shut you the fuck up and removes the fatty but eventually you'll escalate an incident enough they'll decide you're not worth their business.
--- 2430979
>>2430091
>don't mess with me or I'll tell on you
>I've been known to snitch a time or two, punk

Reddit moment
--- 2431022
>>2430322
No, it's more that you're a snitch. You don't have the balls to solve your own problems like a man so you cry like a little girl to an authority figure. Imagine not even having the guts to deal with your problems head on. What are you gonna do when there's no-one to cry to, little pussy? You're a weak coward
--- 2431033
>All this fatty seething.
--- 2431042
>>2430091
Coke bottle glasses & a receding hairline
--- 2431047
>>2430091
You wouldn't do shit lmao
--- 2431241
>>2431033
I am surprised fatties even come here
--- 2431245
>>2431241
What did you think all the paypig incels that shit everything up look like? Lol
--- 2431248
bro imagining scenarios on his head
--- 2431252
>>2430084 (OP)
America: the thread
--- 2431262
>>2430777
Go to the toilet you fucking retards. Planes have toilets. I will just wait there until take off, open the door like Shrek in that opening, and then come back to my seat to crush people under the might of my fat.

>can't go before takeoff
You're a fat fuck, say you have diarrhea.
--- 2431416
>>2431022
>t. never dealt with a true fatty
--- 2431418
>>2430627
>chad
> MDMA

Chads are not drug addicts, retard
--- 2431568
>>2431418
the guys who have the most sex probably use lots of drugs
--- 2431588
>>2431418
>thinks people get addicted to MDMA
kek ok brainlet. I do it once every 6 months or so, once i've had time for my brain chemicals to fully recover
--- 2431753
>>2430091
and then everyone clapped
--- 2432111
>>2430084 (OP)
I'm in Tenerife flying to the UK next week. I'm fucking dreading it because of all the landwhales around here. They're so fat they can barely walk and drive mobility scooters everywhere. It's 4.5 hours on Easyjet. I reserved an aisle seat, that's really my only hope so I can lean over in the event of Orca sitting next to me. If I got a center seat I don't think I would make it without going into a claustrophobic panic wedged between two mountains of human lard. And those fuckers sweat and smell like it, too.
--- 2432249
Fucking Asians, they're skinny but do not respect NO TOUCHING. If the agressive stare doesn't set them straight i gently pick up their insect limb and move it back to their seat. Then they do the Asian grovel: ooohhhh so sarry mistah ching bong ding long.
--- 2432280
>there are actually people ITT defending fatties resting their corpulence on you for multiple hours
They know how big they are. They should buy two tickets, lose some weight or travel a different way.
Your personal bag has to fit under the seat, your body needs to fit in the boundaries of your seat. 
Personally, I've never had to say anything before the flight attendants notice an uncomfortable looking petite girl being smooshed by some fat fuck and do their jobs to cease the assault on me.
--- 2432659
this thread is comedy gold, i love seeing obese fags seethe
--- 2432685
>>2432280
Post feet pics.
--- 2432715
I will fly private, first or business class, or take a train. I can never fly economy again, it is hell on earth. I did it to save money, thinking I could stretch my money farther, and work less, for what? Spend all your money before you die.
--- 2432724
>>2430286
>neighborhood kids playing in my front yard
>one trips on my garden gnome and bust his teeth
>parents sue me for damages
its MY lawn bitch get off it
--- 2432747
>>2430286
How overweight are you?
--- 2432848
>>2432747
a little on the chubby side
--- 2432865
>>2432848
this is what /trv/ has become. holy shit i hate this place
--- 2432901
>>2430091
>Just report people to the jannies
Kys faggot. We used to ridicule tattle tales like you. If I were fat and sitting next to you I would bash your head against the tray table. God I fucking hate zoomers
--- 2432917
>>2432901
ok fatty
--- 2433050
>>2432901
Can you even lift your arm?
--- 2433496
>>2431262
SomeBODY once rolled me
--- 2433538
With all the tranny hate lately it feels really good to get back to our roots of hating fat fucks, who have been very sadly ignored lately when they still deserve to be bullied.
--- 2433539
>>2433050
I don't have to lift shit, you skinnyfags bring me my double QP's curbside bitch
--- 2433675
>>2431022
>t.fat faggot who's never been able to put down the fork
--- 2434049
>>2430084 (OP)
I've never had unknown fat people sit next to me in trains, buses or planes, but I have a morbidly obese friend who traveled with me months ago and I learned my lesson since then. Never again. Ever.
--- 2434055
>>2430324
Cologne smells awful and doesn't cover strong shit smells.
--- 2434119
>>2430091
>Fatties don't deserve human rights
based
--- 2434396
>>2430627
I did this in Paris. They made the plane wait while someone sat next to me for 15mins to gauge my attitude. I just read a book for that time and off
--- 2434897
>>2430091
That fat mans name? 
Albert Einstein.
--- 2436814
>TFW long flight seated next to a fatty
>won't stop touching me
> feels akward but eventually have to get comfortable with it
> best sleep ever on their fat tit meat
> milk is best in-flight meal i've ever had

sitting next to a fatty can be wonderful don't knock it until you've tried it
--- 2436823
>>2430091
90÷ of the times you do this the fatty will just be upgraded to 1st class to resolve the conflict. They always have extra space and it's the solution that leads to the least hurt feelings. Not worth it, just push the armrest down and watch them squel like a pig. Consider them gasping for air your entertainment.
--- 2436829
i sat next to a fat caribbean church lady, she smelled like lotion and was like leaning in next to a pillow all flight
--- 2436831
ITT Twink fembois 

Move over retard I bet you complain about leaning the seat back too. In my Ford f150 we don't care about size and neither should you while I drink beer clap loud at landing and enjoy my holiday
--- 2438248
>>2436823
a fatty thats now in 1st class instead of next to me is like a 1st class to me.
--- 2438253
>>2430091
fpbp
--- 2438260
https://youtu.be/Nu_xTC5Gc2U?t=121 [Embed]
--- 2438684
>>2432715
I fly business even in Europe which is basically the same seating as economy. I just can't fucking stand cattle class anymore. They don't know how to board or deplane and keep getting up and being loud. It's not even the annoying children - it's their parents, "Johnny, sit down! Sit down, Johnny! Johnny don't do that. Johnny be quiet!" Hours of that talk. I'm on the side of Johnny. Just let him run around and shut up, mommy. My last trip from Spain to the UK would have cost 100 euros in cockroach class, but I paid 500 just to sit in the front of the plane with no real frills aside from being away from the cattle.
--- 2438686
>>2430084 (OP)
Just fly first class or private? Or book a seat next to your friends or family?
--- 2438698
>>2438686
>Or book a seat next to your friends or family?
I don't want them sitting next to me.
--- 2439521
>>2438686
>went on holidays abroad with friend
>she used to be a bit fat but nothing major
>we saw each other on a regular basis for years so I didn't notice she became morbidly obese
>"when I was younger and saw [some guy] in Lost asking for a seat belt extender in one episode I was sooo mortified it became my phobia lol
>we get in the plane
>finally realized she's morbidly obese as she's taking nearly half on my seat
>she asks for a seat belt extender, a little embarrassed when asking, she puts in on
>looks like the seat belt is barely enough to hold her, entire fucking trip is uncomfortable until it's over and we go back home
Never again. Next time I'm solo traveling. I'll go back to London alone and do some of the things I couldn't do because she asked for breaks all the time because "muh legs uwu"
--- 2439540
>am considerably overweight for my height, 180 pounds at 5'6
>eat disgusting amounts of food at times because I have little self control
>am still able to easily fit in an economy seat without touching anything

I literally can not fathom how people can possibly get this large. I just don't get it. How is it possible to eat that much? Are they eating three full pizzas and drinking 6 milkshakes a day?

I flew back from Japan last month and across the aisle there was a whale, every time she got up from her seat and moved into the aisle it smelled like pure death and shit. What the fuck?
--- 2439575
>>2439540
Nigga you’re 5’6 of course you can’t fathom getting large
--- 2439577
>>2439540
If you’re the equivalent of 5ft 6in 180lbs, but you are 6ft instead, you will probably start spilling over.