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So he was playing Skyrim for the PlayStation 4, I found the "fast save" option. I know he is on a trophy hunt using multiple savings just in case (I think?) So I don't want to mess with those. Can I just "quick save" and close the game? He is kind of sick so I don't want to wake him up, but I really don't want him to loose anything due to me just turning his console of ... Thanks in advance, silly question I know, but he poured so much time and effort into the game I just want him to wake up tomorrow and continue :) Edit/update: thanks for all the comments/awards. I personally think it's normal to try and help your SO like this, but I appreciate the nice messages. He woke up and was very happy of what I did, everything worked out perfectly Edit: I've seen my post flying around in some subreddits/Instagram. I would really appreciate it if someonecould let me know where?

Yes, quick save should be fine. Just to be safe, press start ( > ), a menu should pop up, go to the save/load and you can make a new save file there for him

So I'm [16M]. A while back there was this big get together to celebrate the latern festival. I had about 2 bottles of beer that's about it. I was definitely sober, I had full control of what I was doing. So I went up to this girl same age. We knew each other before but never spoke. We were in a group just walking. She did not have any alcohol at this point. I put my arm around her waist (nowhere near her ass). And we talk for a bit. Just small talk like how we have never met, tell her my name etc. In this time she does not move away or tell me to go away or any sign of discomfort. During this time She actually puts her arm around my waist as well. I wanted to leave the group and meet some other friends so I turn to her and tell her how beautiful she was tonight and just left . That was the end of our interaction. A few days pass and I find out that she actually went around her school saying that I raped/took advantage of her which I absolutely did not. The extent of physical contact was arms around her waist. My friends also get the news and now whenever I talk to a girl they tease me and call me a rapist. I don't want to confront the girl because if she denies it then I would make me look even worse. Why on earth would she call me a rapist? What do I do ?

Tell your parents and get legal advice.

So a couple weeks ago I was 36 weeks pregnant with my son, On this day, my husband had left at 8 am and took our two younger children to his parents house and my step daughter had already left for the day, to get her senior class schedule and do a few other things done for the school year' I was home alone when all of a sudden I went into labour, I had been cleaning the kids bathroom, when I realised I thought I only needed to use the toilet, I felt a lot of pressure and when I looked down My babies feet were hanging out, I managed to move onto the floor and then realised I was bleeding out, I couldn't move I had to literally scream for help hoping a neighbour or a passerby would notice. I don't know how long I was on the floor for but it felt like hours, but after awhile I heard the front door open then close and I screamed out, My step daughter ran upstairs to find me on the bathroom floor, she went to get some towels and grabbed her phone to call 911. I knew she was actually terrified and had to grab her hand to give her reassurance. The operator on the phone pretty much told her she had to deliver the baby herself until the ambulance got there. She followed everything the operator and delivered my baby boy, when My baby was out he wasn't breathing so she pretty much tore the bathroom apart looking for a nasal aspirator, by the time she got the baby to breathe again, the ems had arrived, where both me and baby were taken to the hospital. Later on when my husband arrived at the hospital the doctor told them if my step daughter hadn't come home when she did, Both me and the baby would have died. Even after both me and my baby were able to come home, my husband hadn't been able to take off time yet so my step daughter took it upon herself to cancel all plans with her friends, and look after the kids while I rested,cooked dinner and cleaned the house as well. That and on top of all that has literally been my rock, In all honesty these 3 weeks I have gotten to know her more than in the 11 years I have been her stepmom. I have never been for thankful for what she has done. I mentioned to my husband last night I feel like she needs a gift or something to show her thankful for what she has done. Neither of us can think of anything though.. any ideas?

Gifts are nice but don’t forget to voice your feelings as well that’s also very important.

I can't believe on the stupidity of this situation, but here we go. My parents at home just told me my aunt is coming to stay a few days, and I have to spare my room for her to use. I'm usually pretty chill about this, but here's the thing: That aunt is a **confirmed** carrier of Corona virus, yet shes coming here and my parents are okay with it...? WTF? As to how exactly she's allowed to travel: she's **not.** This is Illegal and dangerous but it seems i have no say on the matter... my only hope is to avoid getting infected. I need help, what should I do with an infected person on the house? // Update #1 Due to the amount of advices saying that I should report this, I really feel the need to now. I'm typing this as she's on a plane, on her way here, so avoiding that is no longer possible... I will contact the local police department, they should be here before she arrives and I'm definitely getting into trouble... But if i think really hard about it, my parents caused this, not me. It's easier that way. // Update #2 So... This escalated quickly. I called the non emergency line and told them a family member was coming to the house and they were a carrier of Corona. My city is on a lockdown since the growing cases of the last week so I expected the police to come over stay with us until aunt arrives, and they would tell us what to do. Not so... Police arrived, took my parents for interrogation and one of them told me my aunt is being intercepted. Holy, fuck. I'm alone in my house now, it's night, and looks like they're not gonna be here til tomorrow. I think updates will stop for now but for sure I won't be seeing aunt so soon. Might have been the right thing to do but I'm definitely screwed... In a month from now I might be here on the sub again asking how do I adapt to a new home, I'm 20 and I have a day job so my chances of getting kicked out after this are really high :( Thank you for all the advice. No doubt, it was the best course of action. // Post storm update #3 Aunt is being kept at the hospital, she indeed has the virus, and i don't know yet if shes gonna be fined for the trip or not, but I imagine she will : / For those asking, she's not here to just visit, she came *because* of the symptoms. She wanted family contact cause she feared not having another chance (an over reaction, i know). I haven't been kicked out, but parents are not talking to me. To those sending lovely messages saying I should already have my own house: I'm not rich, I pay for my own food and transport and the only things I get from this house are the roof and people to talk to during breakfast as I work during the day and study at night. I don't hate my parents, they're good people, just clueless when it comes to common sense sometimes. So that's it, crisis averted. I'm not getting infected by this god awful virus and aunt should be ok in a week, back to her home to pay the debts. I'll try cooking some nice things and bringing some god news to the table more frequently so my parents forget about this episode, but thanks for all the support in the majority of the comments, good to know this went a lot smoother than hiding in my own house. Cya in the next pandemic o/

You HAVE to report this. Covid is not a joke, look at europe. Just saw your Edit: Thats definetly the right decision. You surely did your part on preventing the virus from further spreading. Thank you!

Original post here : https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/i2nkqx/how_do_i_f21_tell_my_little_sisters_f1614148_the/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf The original post is above, TLDR: Basically my mom and step dad asked me to have sex with my step dad. I declined, freaked out and am now leaving. My concern is for my sisters. My aunt did what she said she was going to do, she barged in with 3 other people, one of them a social worker friend of hers (who was off duty) and my uncle. None of them are allowed at the house so as soon as Scott found out they were there, he called the police. Before the police even showed up, I told my 16 year old sister and the 14 year olds what happened. The 16 year old got angry at her dad. She was walking around the house ranting at her dad and crying. Eventually she decided to come with my aunt and I and then we would firgure out where she could go from then on. However the two 14 year olds did not believe me, they actually started laughing. Then they got angry and told me I was “trying to destroy” our family and “how could you make up a sick lie”. It got to the point where they threw my and my 16 year sisters stuff out the window. By that time the cops came and told my aunt, uncle and the social worker they had to leave the property. The social worker friend let the cops know everything thats been going on. The cops didn’t care, they just cared about the noise and the trespassers. So I, my 16 year old sister, my aunt and uncle and their friend left. Very soon after my grandparents came and got the other three girls, after the 14 year olds called them and came to there senses. I found out my my grandma that one of the 14 year olds confronted her dad and he didn’t deny anything. In fact he called me a whore and said I should’ve had any problems doing what he asked. That’s when they packed a bag and called my grandparents.My grandparents explained everything separately to the little one. She told my grandpa she prefers him to our dad because grandpa doesn’t yell at her. As much as that pained me, I hope it’s enough to keep the girls at my grandparents for good. My 16 year old sister is going to emancipate herself and stay with either our grandparents or our aunt. CPS was called but it was my grandparents this time. I have multiple screen shots on my and my aunts phone of my mother incriminating herself, so we will be able to file charges and hopefully get Scott on the SO registry. That way the girls can stay at their grandparents permanently. Thank you all for the support I appreciate each and every one of your comments, and to the survivors who shared their stories, you are all so strong, thank you.

Step „dad“: I want to fuck you You: no, gross Him: you’re a whore 👌 Good on you saving your sisters. Shame on your mother, I have no words for her. Disgusting.

[Update] Yesterday was suppose to be one of the most happiest days of my life and it turned out to be the worst. My fiancé never showed up to the ceremony leaving me at the altar. His friends and family tried to get a hold of him but all calls went straight to voice-mail. After waiting an hour for him I told my guests that there wasn't going to be a wedding. I opened the reception hall and told them to enjoy the food and open bar, even if there was no ceremony, I still wanted them to have a good time and enjoy the food and drinks. I tried to call him a couple of times but after 3 more failed calls I just stopped and told everyone else who were trying to get a hold of him to stop. He made it clear he didn't want anyone to get a hold of him and I wasn't going to have them waste their time. I didn't cry, I wasn't going to cry. At least not in front of everyone. His mother came to me and apologized through tears, she told me how disappointed she was in him and that she was so sorry. I just shook my head and stuck with her the entire time. I didn't want her to cry and feel bad for something that wasn't her fault. The real MVPs were all my friends. They did their absolute best to keep things from being awkward and entertained everyone. They played music, danced and one of them went as far as going back home to bring a projector and a game system for all the kids and teens to play against each other with. I was glad that the day was somewhat saved but I still felt horrible. My would-be BIL Ethan kept me from getting shit faced when I really wanted to, told me that it would be awkward if I did so I did my best to keep everyone happy. After 11 I told everyone who bought gifts to take them back and get their money back, a few of them refused and had me keep the gifts they got. So now I'm back at the hotel we got and I'm alone. This morning I got a couple of missed calls from my fiancé and several messages that I haven't opened yet. I'm so angry at him, he humiliated me yesterday by not showing up when he could've told me he was getting cold feet. I had my friend message him that I want to be left alone and that if he showed up to the hotel room I was going to call my brothers to have him removed. So far he hasn't shown up but I am getting phone calls from his friends probably all wanting me to speak to him. I don't know if it's me being shallow or not but now I'm rethinking our entire relationship and whether or not I see a future with him.  So another issue is that I have an extra plane ticket. It was supposed to be for our honeymoon but since the fiancé isn't here I decided to enjoy my little getaway vacation for myself. A couple of friends are coming with me but not for another week since they gotta get childcare, put vacation time etc so they can't come since it last second. To be honest I want to invite Ethan because I've never traveled anywhere in my life. I know he's been to where I'm going and I want him to come so he can be there to show us the places to be at. Ethan told me he'd go for me but should I invite him? I asked Ethan's mom and she was all for it but I still don't know if it'll cause drama. Any advice?  Update Okay so I feel like I should explain more about Ethan. First I'm not going to take him. Second, I've known Ethan a little longer than my ex-fiancé. Please believe me when I say he's a close friend of mine, both of us bonded by teasing his brother and with that we just kinda clicked and became fast friends. I wanted to take him because I didn't know how to use my ticket in the airport. I've never been traveling and I didn't want to look dumb by trying to figure it out. Thankfully, someone said what to do and I'm forever grateful so now I feel much more confident. I know it sounded iffy trying to take Ethan but honestly it was for something innocent. I see him more of a brother then anything now that I look at all the comments you guys left. And finally I read my ex-fiance's messages. Yes, he's alive, he wasn't in any terrible accident and the reason he never showed up was because he found out he has a kid. His childhood sweet heart came by with a kid maybe a couple of weeks ago. His best man knew and never told me because my ex didn't want him to tell me until he was 100% percent sure and I guess he found out today. He apologized so many times for not showing up but he couldn't because he felt so guilty of what? I don't know. He said a large part of him wants to make things right and take care of his son because he's always wanted a family. So screw the last 3 years right? I don't know if that means he's going to go back to his ex because he wants to talk over the phone. Honestly, I'm done. I think it's an excuse to get back with his ex, I don't believe he's ever gotten over her and her over him which is why she chose now to show herself. He sent a picture of the kid to me and I went over ex-fiance's mom's fb to see any pictures she posted of ex-fiance when he was a kid. They're low quality but there is definitely a resemblance. It feels so surreal to me, like this one big joke. I feel like I'm missing more info, like there's something else going on but I'll find out later. I haven't responded so instead I'm just going to open a bottle of wine and just get plastered. My best friend is currently on her way with takeout and ice cream so I thought I'd share this. Maybe after my much needed vacation I'll do another update but right now I'm just gonna do me. Until then, fuck you Ben

>now I'm rethinking our entire relationship and whether or not I see a future with him He literally left you standing at the altar. You absolutely should not have a future with someone who does that

I need some advice.  I am so outraged, so livid, that I actually have been spluttering when trying to talk about it. My little brother died Saturday after a 3 year battle with cancer. TL;DR:  My brother (and I) hate(d) religion, and his burial ceremony is to be conducted in the Roman Catholic tradition because our mother "found" god in the last half decade.  I feel this is an incredible disrespect to his memory.  I will be unable to be a pallbearer unless I participate in the Mass. Atheists, do *not* downvote those whom are religious.  Religious types, return the favor please, and do not downvote those opinions you disagree with.  Be civil. Details: He was exceedingly anti-religious throughout his life.  Not militantly atheist, where he wanted to tear down all religions and etc, but actively detested religion broadly because of the thought control and hypocrisy of it. He hated how religion preached peace... *except kill all who do not believe the correct way.*  He hated how religion preached understanding...  *unless someone thought differently* He hated how religion preached love... *unless you didn't bow down, and then eternal torment*. He hated how religion always seemed to act exactly like the leaders of North Korea... act like you love me, do what I say, or forever be imprisoned and tortured. He hated how religion said one could rape, murder, destroy lives... *but as long as you said sorry at some point it was all good*. He hated how religious "leaders" could molest children, but it was all good because they spoke for the "invisible sky wizard". And yet if you lived your life being the most generous, loving, giving person to the point of sacrificing yourself for the betterment of others... you were still allegedly going to be tortured for eternity simply because you did such things because they are the way any of us should be, instead of because Bugs Bunny said we should, and needs must worship Daffy Duck. My little brother, my best friend throughout my life, the person I have fought beside against the world of both far-right and far-left racism, idiocy, hypocrisy, and hate... ...is to be buried in a Roman Catholic Mass/ceremony, because our mother.  A mother that until 5 years or so was non-religious (not anti, like Brother and I, but scoffed at it) until she moved to Oregon where her sister lives (and whose son is a Roman Catholic Father/priest). So, the advice I need: As mentioned... I am outraged and very, very, very, *very*, *VERY* appalled and angry.  I feel that this is an extreme insult to my brother's memory. I will conduct myself with utmost propriety, despite my inclinations to shout out how much my brother would hate what is going on "in his honor".  Heck, if there is ever to be a zombie uprising, this would set it off... as Brother would burst out if his casket if he could. I will be approached by my mother and asked if I have "calmed down"/accepted Jesus Christ since being notified that Brother will be laid to rest with full Roman Catholic ceremony. I plan on asking her if *she* would have "calmed down" and accepted Muhammed if Aunt Gail (my aunt, her sister) was buried in the Muslim faith. I don't want this to be a shitshow.  The only person I have ever unconditionally loved -and who unconditionally loved me back- is dead. I do not want to profane his memory... and yet, the very "ceremony" for his funeral is exactly that. I think I will just *seethe*, and go along with it.  Any sort of confrontation would be worse. But Reddit, as weird as it may be to ask complete strangers... What are your thoughts?

It might be worth communicating this to the preist. Years ago, my family had me attending religious education classes basically from the time I was 5 until 15. It was an expectation that I was supposed to confirm once I reached 15 years old, but I adamantly didn't want to. I had my reasons, but my family was absolutely livid with me and didn't want to hear them. After a lot of negotiation, they agreed that I should talk to the priest of my church. I was unwilling, but agreed. Well it turns out that this was the best possible thing to do. Not only was the priest understanding of my needs, but he reassured me that my feelings and ideas were valid, and if I ever decided to confirm that the doors would be open to me. And that was it. He then took my family and privately conversed with them. They did not leave that conversation happy, but they left me alone after that. Whatever the priest said to them, it was enough to get them off my case without having them completely freak out or lose their trust in me. I understand that not all church communities may operate this way, but it could be worth a shot. It seems that this funeral is going to happen regardless, but if the priest knows what your brother's views were, perhaps he can arrange a funeral speech and procession more accordingly. I'm sorry for your loss. I hope whatever the ceremony entails, it offers plenty of time for reflection on the good memories your brother left behind.

They met through a summer camp two years ago, as he was one of her group leaders. They became ‘friends’ and exchanged phone numbers. Sometime within the past few months, they’ve begun ‘dating’ according to my sister. They apparently confessed their feelings for one another over a phone call and he proceeded to ask her out. She accepted and proudly refers to this creep as her boyfriend. My parents seem to have no problem with this whatsoever. My Dad initially was concerned and as angry as I am but I believe the combination of my mother talking to him / my father actually meeting the perv brainwashed my Dad into seeing things in a different way. I’ve brought up my concerns on multiple occasions but my parents constantly shut me down and have even accused me of causing unnecessary tension and trying to destroy a ‘pure relationship’. I’ve considered going to the police but the fact is they aren’t having sex. I know this for a fact because my sister and the sicko are never left alone. He apparently made a promise to my parents that he’s willing to wait as long as possible if it means he can remain my sisters boyfriend. For whatever reason, they fall right into this bullshit and act like they want what’s best for my sister. I probably didn’t explain enough but I’m just so utterly lost, angry, confused, ect. I honestly can’t even put into words how I really feel. I’m her 22 year old brother and I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders to save her from this sick freak. I know talking to my sister won’t do anything, my parents are a lost cause, and I simply don’t have any evidence of legal wrongdoing. All I know is this will not end well if something doesn’t happen. I love my parents but I’ll be the first to admit they are beyond wack. I want to believe they are choosing to see this as a ‘phase’ in her life or are secretly plotting to catch the guy but deep down I know that’s not the case. They truly believe he’s a good guy and possibly their future son in law which just makes me ill to even think about.

If he's still a leader at that camp you need to report him like yesterday. If he's known her since she was 12 and is sexually attracted to her (as I imagine he is if he's dating her) he needs to be reported to his superiors. Maybe also call your non-emergency police line and ask for advice there.

So a bit of back story; Been with my current gf 6 years. Happy relationship etc. One night I was going with her to a family party but she ended up being called into work. As I am still close with her family I decided I'd still go knowing she would meet me there later. A few hours passed and my gf rang and said she was going to have to stay in all night. I ended up getting super drunk with her sister (around my age) and we ended up having unprotected sex. In the morning we both agreed it was stupid and we would keep our mouths shut so we didn't break up the family. Anyway now she is pregnant and told everyone else it was a "one night stand" but it is confirmed mine. My gf is so excited for her sister to have the baby and it's driving me insane. What do I do? #Also; sister is keeping the baby but is not interested in me being a " dad " to it. Family is quite rich so I don't think she will have any issues supporting the child. #Also; no DNA test done but sister claims I have been only sexual contact within time period needed to impregnate. #Also; How would I even tell her? #Also; Thanks for the gold? 🤷‍♂️ /r/Mygirlfriendssister

After discussing this intensely with my wife we realized the best solution for their family and well all parties really is probably to claim you're gay and breakup and move overseas.. Not even kidding.

Like wtf, this dog is my total bro. He deserves to be inside the house as much as anybody.

"This dog is my total bro" 😂😂👌 Dude - that dog is gonna have your back no matter what. Your house, your rules. If she can't understand why you'd want your companion to keep you company in your zone, then it sounds like you and her just aren't on the same page. It's fine to break up with her, if that's a deal-breaker for you.

I (M23) have been married to my wife for just over 5 years. We have a 4 year old daughter. For the past week or two, I've had my suspicions that my wife was talking to someone and/or cheating on me. Last night after I got home, when she was asleep I checked her phone and confirmed my suspicions. She has been talking to a co-worker, and the texts from the past two days (previous texts were deleted) ranged from both of them saying "I love you" to making plans today for him to come to my house today while I am at work. While they didn't definitively say they were going to have sex, it was STRONGLY implied. There is some evidence of other sexual acts already having taken place. I am now sitting at a Waffle house after calling in to work to say I'm not coming in. I'm planning on trying to get proof of the visit if he does come over by watching when my alarm is armed/dis-armed (through the app on my phone). After my research, if it ends in divorce, if I can prove she has committed adultry, she will not be eligible for any alimony in my state. I could stop them from having sex by going home and confronting her before it happens, but it could cost me a lot in the long run if our marriage does fall apart. I love her and don't want it to end, but I can't see how I can forgive her for this. Even if I confronted her now, I would always still feel the same as if she did have sex with him. This hurts so much. I love her more than anything, and I feel like there is a hole in my chest, and lead in my stomach. I am physically hungry, but can't bring myself to eat because I am so nauseous. I can't stop shaking, I can't think straight, I feel like a part of me has been ripped out. I am terrified of what this will mean for my life, and more that that, the life of my daughter. I don't know what to do... UPDATE: First off thanks for the silver. Too bad my first reddit award had to be for this, but thanks nonetheless. Huge thanks to everyone for all the advice, suggestions, and support. While I still feel physically sick, I am able to think clearer thanks to everyone. I will keep you all updated as this unfolds. 2nd UPDATE: I just want to say thanks... again. I haven't left this post since I created it, and I've still not stopped reading. This is the only thing keeping me sane right now. If you are just getting here, please don't think because there are 250+ comments that your opinion/advice isn't important. I've read every single comment with an open mind, and I am factoring all of them into what I do.. also it really helps.. a lot. I have yet to confront them, as the guy hasn't shown up, and I don't think he will... today atleast. Maybe she caught on that I knew. I tried to play it like nothing was wrong this morning when I left, but damn did it hurt. Not sure if she bought it. In their texts, they planned for him to come over Thursday morning (it is currently 12:40pm). If he doesn't show up, I think I'm going to talk to her about it tonight. 3RD UPDATE: Every single one of you are awesome. You're really helping me get through this. The guy never showed up, so here is the current plan: I'm going to act like nothing is wrong for now. After talking to you all, and family, I think I can put on to act like nothing is wrong. I'll go see a lawyer in the morning, and I talked to a PI that I'll probably be hiring. I know from the texts that she planned on having him come over during the hunting trip I have planned for next weekend, so I'm going to make sure I go, and that the PI knows. I think I've decided I'm done. I don't want to try to fix it. I'm going to cover my ass, and get out. It's not just an affair in the sense that she's having sex. She tells him she loves him, and she doesn't seem to love me anymore. I feel like she's trying to use me. She wanted a new car, and for me to pay for her to go to school, but wanted to be with him. Currently, she left to (presumably) pick up my daughter from daycare. I'm watching the time. I know how long it should take. If she takes longer, I can guess where she went. Either way, I'm going to try to make it through Christmas, and my daughter's birthday next Friday without saying anything about this. Hopefully the PI can find evidence then. Wish me luck. UPDATE 4; GET READY, THIS IS A BIG ONE: So I came home, and acted normal. Everything seemed normal. We joked a bit, and fuck if that doesn't hurt when you're heartbroken, and had dinner. Sitting on the couch after dinner she asks me to pause the TV, and asks when I was gonna mention "it". I asked what "it" was, and she said she knew I saw the texts. Start the conversation. She tells me that he didn't come over (which I obviously knew) and that she told him she doesn't want to talk to him anymore. She blocked his number. Obviously since she has done this the original plan is off the table. I still love her. My heart is broken, I dont know if I can ever forgive her or trust her; I don't know if I can be in a relationship with her. She want's to work on us. I don't know if I am willing to or not. She says she was talking to him because she didn't feel wanted. She didn't feel a deep emotional connection between us and he "knew all the right things to say." She said she told him she couldn't be with him and told him multiple times she was done with him, yet here she is inviting him to our house. She said it wasn't a choice what she felt for him. The exact story was along the lines of "He was bagging at my register one day, and I accidentally touched his hand, and it was like electricity." I know you're probably reading this, and thinking it's a load of BS... Yeah me too. How am I supposed to trust her? I can't see her side of this. Should I give her a chance? Should I try to work on things? I don't know. Do I want to? Is it worth it? I have to figure all this out. I told her I can't decide now. I have to think about it. I'm thinking about asking some co-workers (no family in town, perks of being in the Military) if I can crash on their couch for a few days. Get away from it all and think. Of course I'd come back for Christmas for my daughters sake. I don't see any point in hiring the PI now, as I genuinely don't think she'd so anything for a while. Maybe I'm wrong. Obviously I have been before. I'm taking plenty of precautions in the mean time to make sure I know what she is doing, and if anything is questionable, I'm done. Of course I won't tell her about any of this. This will be my last update for today. Please continue to offer your perspective and advice, but I think this is largely a decision I'll have to make after due consideration. UPDATE 5; UNANSWERED QUESTIONS, MY FEELINGS, AND THE PLAN: I'm going to do a little Q&A section for the most asked questions. Q: How did she find out I know? A: Two ways. She had a strong suspicion that I knew because when she woke up, there was a notification on her phone for a new screenshot, but when she clicked it, there was no file. She was 100% sure I knew once she found this post. Yup she's seen it, she's probably reading this now. Hi wife. We'll get more into that later. Q: What did she say when I asked if she had sex with him? A: She said no. I am inclined to believe her, because many of the texts, including some the last ones, he was saying how excited he was to "finally see how hot [her] pussy is" <---that's a direct quote from him from the texts btw. No does this mean I believe that she didn't? No. Not at all. It doesn't change how I feel whether she did or not. She planned on it, and probably would've if I hadn't found out. It'll be a long time before we ever are intimate again, if we ever are I will definitely have us both checked for STDs. Q: How do I know she won't do it again? A: Obviously I don't. If we try to fix things, I'll probably never be able to fully trust her again. She is going to have to prove that she will be 100% honest with me. Here's the first test: To my wife-If you are reading this, text me NOW; text me right now and tell me. Stop reading and text me. I will know if you have read it and don't tell me. It will be over. Some info on the comments I've seen: I'd say roughly 80-90% of you are telling me to lawyer up and leave her. Of that 80-90%, around 20% is actually making any kind of argument as to why I should rather just saying "Once a cheater, always a cheater." or something similar. The other 10-20% are telling me to either give it a shot, or to do what I want/what makes me happy. The majority of those posters are making good arguments as to why I should stay. Thank you to everyone that has commented. It means so much to me that some many internet strangers have taken the time to try and help or comfort me. Also, please don't downvote people because you don't agree with their opinion. Everyone's opinion matters, even if it doesn't align with yours. I feel like in update 4, I represented her wrongly. She was saying that she did what she did with him because she felt unwanted, but she understood that it was her fault. She knows she should have talked to me. She knows she is the one in the wrong. She says she doesn't blame me for it. I didn't push her away and make her do this. She said she could control how she felt for him (which I still have a hard time believing), but she could've controlled what she did. She let him talk her into it because I think that even if she doesn't realize it, it's what she wanted at the time. Our marriage hasn't been perfect. We've had issues. We've had issues communicating, especially lately. We've not had a great sex life. I felt like she didn't care enough, and she felt like I didn't care enough. Neither of us tried enough to work on it. Does that mean I blame myself for this? Fuck no. Not even a little. She did this, and she knows that's how I feel. I'm not trying to make you guys like her, I just want you to understand that I don't think, and never did think, that she is a whore that is a terrible person. She is a terrible wife for what she did to me, but in general is not a bad person. Now, for the plan going forward: I thought long and hard (ha) last night and this morning about what I wanted. What would make ME happy. I'm not going to make the decision to stay or leave based on what she wants. I'm not going to decide to stay to keep out family together. I have to make it based on what I want. I want to stay with her... but that doesn't mean I've decided to. I want us to work things out and talk to counselors and our marriage be better than ever, but I have no idea if that will happen. After I knew she read this post, I knew that she knew about the SC law on adultery, and that she wouldn't be entitled to alimony if she was caught. That was my only defense. Now that she knows, I don't think she'd do anything with anyone for a long time, which means that hiring a PI now or when I go hunting next weekend would be useless, however if she's reading this and knew I wasn't hiring one, she could think she could get away with it. I'm putting some safeguards in place to ensure that doesn't happen, or if it does I have proof. I came up with an idea. I knew I couldn't and wouldn't trust her for a long time if ever again if we tried to fix things. I figured out the only thing that can even start to make me believe that MAYBE she actually wants to stay with me for me and work on our relationship, and not stay with me for what I can do for her. I asked her if she would sign a postnuptial agreement. I'll have to talk to a lawyer still, but if she will agree to sign a contract that if we divorce, even at no-fault, she gets nothing. No alimony, no possessions except certain outlined things that are undeniably hers (her computer, her clothes, her jewelry, etc.), and no child support. (Let me clarify this because I've gotten a couple of comments about it; I wouldn't not support my daughter and I wouldn't keep my daughter from her, I'd just like to avoid court ordered child support, and give her x amount to support my daughter based on how long she has her at any given time, rather than x amount per month). I don't know how it would work, hence why I have to talk to a lawyer and make sure I can do it like that. I have further plans, but I will not be posting them here as she may see this, and those plans involve her not knowing about them. I may reveal them later on, but it will be long from now. At this point, if the postnuptial agreement works how I hope, and she signs it, I think I'd be willing to TRY to work on things. I know a lot of you aren't going to like this. Maybe she is lying to me. Maybe she really is just a piece of shit... but I knew her before she did this. I knew her before our marriage degraded. I don't think she did it because she wanted to have sex with someone else. I don't think she did it because she doesn't love me. I think she did it because he was telling her the exact same things I used to when we were first together. I think she misses what we used to be, and while we will never be what we used to be, this will go one of theee ways. Either we try to work on things, it doesn't work out, and we get a divorce. We try to work on things, she continues to cheat, and we get a divorce. Or, we try to work on things, we fix problems we have had with ourselves and our marriage since we first got together, and our marriage and relationship will be stronger than it has ever been. I'm hoping for the latter. I love you guys. You are awesome. The amount of support I've gotten has been overwhelming. I'm still reading every (top-level) comment, and message I get. Shout out to the fella that gave me my first gold, and a huge shout out to the champ that gave me my first platinum. Please, continue to let me know what you think. I know a lot of you won't be happy with my decision, or will be disappointed in me, but I've gotta do this for me. Quick add on to my latest update: She has TERRIBLE self image issues. She thinks the worst of herself. She's also super introverted and doesn't get to know many people. This is the first job she's had where she's been around other people in years. Of course this doesn't excuse anything, but I felt like it was relevant. P.S. Next update will probably be after next week. UPDATE 6: Hey guys. Sorry I've made you wait for an update. Currently sitting at the bar, drinking some Jack & coke. So we talked. We tried to work things out, and it seemed like it was getting better. Then she said that she wasn't sure how she felt or if she wanted to try. We talked so more and she said she did want to try. We had a session of counseling with a therapist Wednesday. The counseling went more or less like this. She said she felt like she wasn't getting enough out of the marriage, and that I didn't care or talk to her. The therapist asked her some questions and she answered basically saying she could tell I did care and did talk to her (or try to anyway). The therapist kinda explained to her that it wasn't that I didn't care (by her own admission), and instead that she just wasn't happy with it and didn't know what she wanted. Well, she decided what she wanted. Last night she started setting up an air mattress in the extra room, and I saw she had some new sheets that she had ordered to fit it. I looked at her phone to see when she had ordered them, and she was texting him again. So obviously, we're done. We will be getting a divorce. I know a lot of you are going to say "I told you so", but I was 100% aware this was a possibility when I tried to work things out, and I don't regret it at all. I will look back on this in the future and know I did everything I could to fix things. I have nothing left to regret, and that makes me happy. I tried, and I can never blame myself now. Now, before anyone says it, please refrain from calling her a bitch, or just generally talking shit about my wife. As you cant just stop loving at will, I still love her. Telling me how shitty a person she is doesn't help. I don't forgive her, and I may never, but i don't resent her. I still want the best for her and out daughter and want her to be happy. I genuinely believe she regrets hurting me, but (at least believes that) can't help how she feels. We are done, but she is currently planning to move back to Florida with her family, which means leaving this guy too. She doesn't think she can be happy with me anymore, but I don't really think she's leaving me to be with him. In my opinion, she is excited about the pursuit. The "puppy dog" love that you get when you meet someone new. I think she is damaged, and needs help to figure out herself, and her self-deprecation issues. She will be staying here in our house for the time being, and seeing a therapist (hopefully) while she still gets the benefit of it being married to me. By SC law, we will have to live apart for a year before we can file for the divorce, but she will be leaving relatively soon. We have agreed to do mediation instead of having lawyers involved to save us money and fighting. We still get along well enough. She has agreed that she will not pursue alimony, and I think she will be giving me full custody of our daughter if the courts accept it, but with her still getting as much visitation as possible. I won't try to fuck her over, as much as you guys will tell me too, and although I love you all for all the support and everything you have done for me, you don't know me, and you don't know her. She's not a terrible person. I truly believe she is telling me the truth and won't try to fuck me over either. It's gonna be rough for a long time, but we'll make it through this. The most important thing to me right now is making sure our daughter is taken care of, and that we do what is best for her. I'm on drink #4 now, and getting tired of typing, so I'm done for now, but if I left out any details (and I'm sure I did) feel free to ask, and I will reply to any questions, as well as updating the update to include the details I left out. I appreciate you all more than you can know, and I wish I could afford to give each and every one of you medals, but unfortunately I can't. If anyone is in the Columbia, SC area, I'd love a drinking buddy (now or later). I'm buying... unless like 40 people try to come. Have a great day. Thanks for reading. Thanks for everything. You're amazing. Update part 4 years later: All is said and done, and while I know this was a wild ride, it ended happily for me and my daughter. I posted an update [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/109q3fc/update_my_wife_is_cheating_help_me/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button). Thanks for being here.

You should speak to an attorney about the correct way that evidence is used to prove adultery before you do anything because you’ll probably fuck it up.

My bio parents put me (15m) up for adoption when I was born so I was always in foster homes until I was twelve. I had a teacher Janice (33f) who was my home room teacher. Janice found out about me being a foster kid and how I wished I had a family. Janice had also been a foster kid growing up and so long story short she then became my foster mom and adopted me. Janice is the best mom I could have ever asked for. She has been so unbelievably kind and loving to me and I absolutely adore her. The problem is that I don’t call her mom, I just call her Janice. I want to start calling her mom but have no idea how to without making it awkward. Please help me internet strangers. Update So….. was not expecting this big of a response. Thank all of you for responding and some of the ideas made me really tear up. Anyways this morning I went to Janice and I said “good morning mom” she just looked at me and started crying then came over and hugged me and kissed my forehead. I hugged her back and she said I could call her whatever made me comfortable and that she loves me more than anything. I just replied with “I love you mom”. So yeah hope this update makes someone’s day because it certainly made mine. Have a great day. Also made a typo I’m 15 not 16 lol

Now matter how you ask her, I think she will be so happy to have you call her "mom." Even if how you ask her is very awkward, she will still be profoundly moved to know that you want to call her "mom."

An update post to my “I think my son is gay” A few days ago, I made a post titled “I think my son is gay”, I said that I wanted to get some time off work so that I could talk to him and hopefully get him to come out. Here is a link to my original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/afp5jv/i_think_my_son_is_gay/?st=JR0QSZ28&sh=ad7bd9c9 I was overwhelmed with lots of helpful advice and now I would like to share with the ones that are interested, how it went! So in my original post I said how I wanted to get time off work to spend time with him but sadly I could not do this and instead I got permission from the post office if I can bring my son along on one of my deliveries which they said yes too. I talked to my son on Tuesday and asked if he would be interested in spending some time with me the next day and perhaps come to work with me. I said he could miss a day of school to spend time together. He was happy to spend time with me and he also didn’t seem to mind waking up early to come. So yesterday came and we are both waking at around 6:30am we both get washed, have our breakfast and we get ready. We jump in the post van and we head to the post office. I noticed I had a bigger delivery than usual which was good because it meant I had more time to be with my son. We begin driving and start our conversations small I ask how he has been doing at school and things like that (my son is 16). What I didn’t mention in my first post is that my son isn’t my biological son, his real dad left when he was 12 and his mother (my wife) died in 2011. Eventually we came by a very convenient charity which was to help prevent violence against gay youths. I pulled over so that we could go check it out, I believed that if he saw me donating money and talking about how gay people should be able to be accepted it will help him think I’m open to gay people. I donated £10 and we got back in the post van and this is when he says “Tim, what made you do that?” I explained that I don’t think it’s right that gays are seen as different people and said that if my son was gay I would accept him and treat him no different. He went quiet and about 30 minutes later he says “Tim, I have something to tell you, I’m gay”. I just stopped the van and began to hug him telling him that I’m proud that he has cane out and told him that he is very brave. We both did some crying and we celebrated with ice cream and McDonald’s. I’m sorry if this has been a long post but I’m proud of my boy and I wanted to share this with you kind people that helped me. Thank you all! TL;DR took my son to work with me, donated to a charity to help stop violence against gays, son came out as gay, we celebrated with ice cream and McDonald’s Edit: WHAT THE FRICK!!! So many people replied my goodness I showed my son he was so happy honestly it made his day thank you all so much, I’m speechless, how can you amazing people exist, I won’t question it because it’s been truly amazing honestly can’t express this enough THANK YOU ALL!!!

I’m so happy for you Tim, this was a good read. I commented on your original post and too see that everything has worked out is great. Also I wanted to praise you for how good you are to him even though he is not your biological son. You may not be his biological dad but you are certainly his real dad! Good job man and I hope you have a good future

English is not my native language so please bare with me to be honest, I just join here to ask monetary assistance on a assistance group here. I am a Muslim girl, just turned 18 and I ran away from our home because my parents is forcing me to marry a guy a lot older than me, I guess he is around 45-50 years old. My parents is asking me to marry him cause my brother saw us in not a good situation and misinterpreted it, he was actually sexually assaulting me. It is really important on our religion to stay pure until marriage and it is humiliating for them to saw me on that position. I try explaining them what actually happened but they are not listening and just forcing me to marry a disgusting old man. I run away home I just can't accept that I will marry a devil and it hurts me deeply that my family is not believing me. I ran away home and currently staying at a friend but I can't be here forever. I ran out of money and still trying to look for a job, I cannoy reach out to any relatives because they will notify my parents I will need to ask assistance to a group here on Reddit but it is not allowing me, asking me for a karma. I don't what that is and really don't know where to get them. I want to run away from my city as far as I can, but I need help from strangers, it is humiliating to ask for assistance there but that's my only way, I tried gofundme as Twitter suggests but it is not available on our country. Please please help me gain karma or tell me what karma on Reddit means. I want to get out of here as early as possible so that my parents will not catch me or if there is any other group that provides assistance without any karma. Thank you so in advance. Ps. I am really overwhelmed with all your support and warm messages, you've been all a great help and makes it less more depressing. I really apologize for not replying on your comments one by one, it's just that I am just connected to a convenient store WiFi and it's not stable, but I am reading everything and is trying to reply to you all good people. Just to add, I'm from the Philippines. I'm really scared to disclose this, I actually tried asking help on twitter and when I told them I'm a Filipina I was bombarded with a lot of guys trying to buy explicit pictures, because according to them, Philippines is land of cheap woman, but we are not. Please change this mindset. Again thank you and Im almost about to reach my karma goal. ♥️ PSS. thank you all so much. I'm literally crying I have saved everything, links, suggestions and I took screenshot of everything just a remembrance of how good people are. I really wanted to to thank all of you, one by one to show you how grateful I am but I don't know why for some reason it is no longer allowing me to send you a private message and to reply on your comments. I just really need 400 karma, just for me to be able to post on r/assistance but you give me a lot and I couldn't be more thankful and also to the badges and awards, I really don't know what that means and how to use it but still, thank you, I know that it is special here on Reddit. I have contacted DSWD and they said that they are willing to help but just needed to verify my background first, Im really scared because they might need to contact my parents. But yes, I will already be moving and will need to visit their office. I'm really sorry for dragging you all here, I'm really sorry especially to the ones that message me telling I'm a karma whore, I maybe am, I just needed those karma; I also decided not to post on any community as well including the ones I planned on asking donations and help, i don't know if I can handle any more hate on my private message and it's unfair, I see posts on those communities asking for help because themselves and loved ones who has terminal disease and such, they deserve the donation more than I am. I'm sorry that some of you can't believe my story and telling me hurtful things DMs sorry that I don't want to reply to you guys, but please as much as possible let's be nice to one another, the world is hard on us already, let's not belittle someone's pain just because you are not experiencing it. I'm forever thankful to all of you. It's a great community and a proof that humanity still exists, I am looking on every option you guys provide. Sorry for being so dramatic, Im just really moved with all of your kindness. Thank you and may Allah and your God's bless you. ♥️ Last edit: I still have mo words but thank you. Just an update, I still posted on a subreddit asking for assistance but it was removed since I need to be a user for 60 days, I cannot risk on waiting that long, I'm really sorry but is there any other group I can reach out for monetary funds? I have found a shelter, and they advised me to keep the name on private, a fellow Filipino helped reached them thank you but we are still gathering funds for my transport money. They allow me to stay there and also allowed to hide my religion, I'm sorry but I don't want to practice Islam anymore, I still know that there is God but practicing it's rules is not for me. I wanted to freely express who I am. This might be the last edit I will do. I'm really thankful for all of your help. I will never forget it.

What country are you in? Maybe we can help you find assistance

EDIT1: my sister (who should be a private eye honestly) managed to find his grandparents and their phone number so his grandmother is currently on her way. Thanks to everyone who offered their advice. This is the first time anything like this has happened and I was more concerned with protecting the kid than worrying about the legality of doing so, so thank you for reminding me to do things correctly EDIT2: I just woke up to an inbox of very mixed feelings from people who think I did the right thing, wrong thing, dumb thing, etc. and I'm sure there will be a similar mix regardless of what I say but here's more details I didn't mention before I went to sleep. * I live in a predominately black neighborhood in a southern state. I just moved here less than two months ago and haven't seen many police but, from previous experiences, the cops aren't my first choice of who to call. * The little boy was also black and reminded me of one of my nephews. I'm 26 and my 18yr nephew (it's my sister's home) was also here with me so I didn't even think of anybody potentially thinking we were doing something to the kid. When I was his age I frequently hung out with the older kid (like 10yrs older) next door and his friends (they never bullied me or made me feel like I was annoying) so as soon as I saw him that's what I was reminded of. * As soon as I sat him down on the couch and turned some cartoons on, I went into the other room and facetimed my older sister who lives there but was out of town. She said he was the kid from next door and that she had his uncle's number (who also lives there) and was going to try and call him first because the boy said he wanted either his uncle, or he wanted to go to his older brother's (14) house. * His older brother is a half brother from what it seems, and lives with his biological father and his paternal grandparents (so no relation to his mom). The kid told me he doesn't know his real father. * He said he didn't have any phone numbers for anyone besides his mom but he knew the name of the street that his older brother lived on, and the names of that kid's grandparents. I told my sister all of this and within like 10mins she had found one of the grandparents and spoke to them on the phone. * I have heard horror stories about CPS, the foster care system, and police so forgive me for not immediately choosing those options. Especially as a black man. From my perspective those were not the safest option for the kid. * In terms of bruises, he said he had none. He also said it was the first time she'd ever done that but that she threatens to a lot. * He said the reason he got in trouble was because his mom thought he had called one of his teachers "the B-word" through his virtual learning thing. He said it wasn't him and that someone else must have signed in with his account and typed it. I don't know if I believe the whole story but I thought if he had planned his escape out like this and actually executed then it really must've been that bad of a beating. * I asked him if he felt safe at home and his reply was "I don't feel safe for my little brother" * Since I live next door I'm gonna make sure to keep an eye on him and his little brother and invite them over (I have other nieces and nephews nearby that are his age) even just to make sure his mom knows somebody else is aware of them and is watching/listening. * Oh, and the reason why I thought calling the cops would benefit me more than the child is because it would absolve me from anything like kidnapping, harboring, or child endangerment etc. but would most likely result in one of the cops staying with him talking with him while the other goes to the house and explains what's happening. That would inevitably lead to the kid going right back to that house. * The only other element I can think of is that I won't say I fully believe that it is an abusive home because I know of a lot of black moms that spank their kids pretty hard sometimes but still love them to death. It's not always out of hate, sometimes it's because they haven't been taught a better option. So I'm not 100% convinced but I'll definitely make sure they know we've got both kid's backs. * Also, in the potential situation where it's not an abusive home but maybe a little too heavy handed/frequent with the corporal punishment, that genuinely could be a better situation than foster care. Which is all kinds of messed up but a definite possibility. &#x200B;

Aw poor kid. If his uncle is nice than even if you call the police he would not get in trouble, just his mom would. I believe they would take the word of the boy regarding his uncle being innocent. With that said even with this nice uncle, this child was beaten and harassed so badly that he had to show up on a stranger’s doorstep to get to safety. Do you fr wanna send him back there?

First part: https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/comments/h83sy2/i16_found_my_underwear_in_my_brothers17_room/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf Okay so first off I want to thank everyone who gave me genuine advice. I saw some people saying that he could’ve mistaken my sister’s trainer bra for a sports bra, I don’t see how that makes it any less inappropriate. Also my sister’s trainer bra is like 3 times smaller than my bras. But anyways I told my mom that I found my underwear under my brothers bed, I didn’t tell her about her and my sister’s bras. She decided to wait for my dad to get back from work, so we waited until he got home. Once he did my mom told him about my underwear and they both went to my brother’s room to talk to him. My dad was calm but my mom was really mad. She demanded to see the box so my brother showed them the stuff. I could tell my mom was in disbelief. My mom saw my crusty thong and my little sister’s trainer bra and started screaming at him. In my 16 years that I’ve known my dad, I’ve only ever seen him cry once (when my little sister was born) but he was crying now. I left the room to go with my sister while my mom still yelled at my brother. It’s been almost an hour since this happened and my parents haven’t said anything to me. I’m in my room with my sister watching a movie right now. I’ll keep you guys updated.

You did the right thing but also, not to scare you, but I'd definitely make sure to have a lock on yours and your sister's door.

I suspected this to be true for some time but I figured it was paranoia. Today I found out it wasn't paranoia at all. I'm not sure what to do. I live in an apartment building with thin walls between the units. Earlier I was talking to my therapist over zoom (we are doing zoom until the pandemic ends), and I heard a female voice next door very clearly say to someone else "shh she's doing therapy, can you hear it?" Their voices got louder as I could tell they were getting closer to the wall. I talk to my therapist about incredibly sensitive topics and I am deeply disturbed that this happened and that they have been listening to me. I am left to wonder what else they have heard that is personal. I'm not sure how to approach this. I do not know them, I have seen them only a handful of times, I know it is a man and a woman who live there, and Im not sure if I should approach them about this.

Loudly say "I'm sorry, my neighbours have their ear up against the walls listening in on us again" and then can you move to another room? Is there a room with a wall that doesn't join to theirs?

I am at a total loss. My brother is 22 years old but has the mental capacity of about 8. He has seizure disorder, autism, and a litany of other health problems due to brain damage at birth. He was playing something on his N64 I set up for him and I was downstairs playing on my phone. I was house-sitting (technically babysitting) for my parents. (Yes they are in the process of getting him in assisted living/home for adults with issues like this). Suddenly out of nowhere I hear a hideous scream, inhuman even. I race upstairs and my brother has the door shut and barred. Horrified, I pound on it and ask what happened and he keeps saying nothing over and over. I demand he open the door and he said no he's busy. He won't tell me what I heard was, or what happened. Freaked out, I race downstairs to the garage and grab my dad's stepladder and climb up to his window, and holy fuck. My brother is hunched over chewing on his fucking now-dead guinea pig. There's blood ***everywhere***. I immediately called 911, my parents, and his social worker and I don't know how to handle this. He's currently under observation at a mental hospital, my parents are pissed I "let him" do that, and that I called 911 over that, and I am not sure how to cope with this mentally. I mean, what the hell. **edit**: Lots of good advice from everyone that posted seriously. Thanks for the assurances. I will update after we find out what's going to happen to him. Sounds like he's in observation for 72 hours, so it might be a while before I have anything new to share. ***EDIT/UPDATE:*** My brother was released Friday afternoon into my parents custody, and they have already removed all traces of a pet and have temporarily removed his door. He will probably get the door back but not the lock. The eval we were given was really big and complicated but basically stated that it was probably a seizure that triggered a violent episode. If he exhibits any more violent or potentially violent behavior they requested we call 911 right away. We have a social worker assigned to us and they will be visiting my parents and brother on monday morning. Nothing else new to report, except for my reoccurring nightmares. I am also in the process of seeing a therapist and have an appointment scheduled for this wednesday afternoon for someone that specializes in family related trauma. Thanks again to everyone and I appreciate your help!

Update: Wife believes me now. I called her crying about what my brother did and she apologized over and over. My parents also called me a few minutes ago and asked if I needed anything, and that they were grateful I was so willing to help my brother. ***edit:*** I have another update, it looks like he is for certain under 72 hour observation. At the end of that they will be releasing his eval to my parents. We're also in the process of getting him into a group home for people in his situation. My wife gets home today and I am really looking forward to it because this week sucks moldy horse cock. I will update again after his 72 hour observation (Assuming all goes well, tomorrow sometime)

So few years back me and my wife adopted a girl who is now 17. Truth be told, I never really wanted a kid it something my wife wanted to do which was adopting. I loved her very much so I went for it and gave it a shot but it felt strange. My father and mom was never good to me in fact both were abusive in their own different ways. Now what happened at the start of last year my wife died. Things took a dark turn and I went into a dark place. I got into a bad drinking habit. My daughter helped out of the drinking habit. Which I don't understand why because I really didn't care much about her. I always been scared of being a dad in case I turned out like anything like my parents. She wouldn't leave me alone or give up. I know now I'm not them and I promised to treat her like I should have long ago. I started pouring all my alcohol into the sink I was done drinking. I realized I still have family that cares and I wanna do my best. She deserves my best. I just wanna know from other parents what be a good surprise for a teen her age? I realized I was an asshole running from the past but with her help I somehow managed to recover and I might go far as saying even better than before.

Wow, she sounds amazing. If you haven't already, you better tell her how much she means to you.

I'm 20 and I'm currently trying to date but it's very hard since I'm very short (5'6) and in my state guys seem to be really tall. And it doesn't help that short guys are getting trashed on pretty hard on tiktok. I ended up matching with a girl, we started talking and eventually she asked for my height. I told her and was expecting her to stop talking to me but she didn't. We setup a date and I was really nervous but also excited because I haven't been on a date before so this was my first. I made sure I looked nice and picked a nice restaurant. She got to to the restaurant but everything felt different, she wasn't engaging much in conversation and seemed disinterested. It was 30 minutes of me trying to stir up conversation but she wasn't interested I guess. She left to use the bathroom but after a few minutes I realized she left, it was a pretty expensive meal too. I see tall guys around campus in relationships and I don't think I'll get to experience that. I just don't feel good about myself anymore. Edit: I just wanted to say thanks to everyone that commented, reading through the comments has made me feel a little better now. Thanks.

Look, my husband is 5'6" and to me he's the handsomest man to walk this earth. I'm sorry people have made you to feel insignificant because of your height.

I'm a truck driver and have been one for over 20 years. I got married 12 years ago and had 2 daughters 8 and 12 years old. When me and my wife started dating I told her about how my job often has me on the road for days at a time and she was fine with that. I got home after 3 days of driving to find my house empty. On the hed there was a note written by my wife saying that they were tired of me being gone all the time and that she was leaving me. The note also said that my daughters want nothing to do with me ever again. When I'm home always spend time with my family and face time them when I'm taking a break. I always bring them souvenirs from the interesting places I've been and made it clear that even if I don't see them much I love them. I just feel so broken right now, everyone i love don't want me in their lives and I tried calling them but they never answered. How do I go on?

Get a lawyer. Go see one tomorrow. Find out where you stand. Speak to your in laws or friends to find out where your children are. Good luck.

Me and my bf are currently on vacation and drove almost 25 hours without eating anything mostly because he didn't want to stop. We got to our hotel room at around 10:30 pm and I was absolutely starving and asked if he wanted to grab dinner at the Cafe across the street and he said no. I tried to go to sleep but couldn't because of how hungry I was. I ended up going to the Cafe while my bf was asleep and got myself a burger and fries. I get back to our room to see him waiting for me and started yelling at me for leaving. He complained that I only had to wait 8 hours more for the breakfast bar to open. My stomach was actually hurting from not eating anything and there was no way I could wait that long. Does he have the right to be angry at me?

There has to be more to this. Driving 25 hours, afraid to stop and eat? No food in the diner across the street? Are you guys fleeing the FBI or something? Like, literally 92% of a vacation is cutting loose and eating at rando diners in the middle of the night.

Edit:Whoa...Never thought this post would have blown up. I have received hundreds of messages.Thank you everyone for your warm messages.I am sorry I couldn't reply you all.I will try to update after a month if my condition is stable enough or if I am alive. Good bye everyone😊.

Say everything you ever wanted to say. Eat the foods you enjoy. Be with the people you care about and who care about you. My sympathies young man.

Edit: Sorry if i dont reply to your comment, I didnt expect so many! but Ive decided to have a conversation with her about if before making any decisions. Thank you all for your advice. (btw i have nothing against sex workers) I will make an update post after our conversation. I don't know what to do, I (18M) have been with my girlfriend (18F) for around 9 months now and last night, we were hanging out and she randomly told me that if she had the opportunity to sell her nudes online or to people around us, that she would do it. That made me extremely upset internally, because I'm an insecure person and knowjng that she would do that stuff for other guys makes me sick to my stomach. I havent told her how i feel yet. Before she was "officially" my girlfriend she asked me if i would date someone like Belle Delphine, and I said no, because that would make me insecure about the relationship and because exclusivity is important to me and she still decided to accept to be my girlfriend. She also said that it's okay for her to do it, since she wouldnt mind if I did it. But the thing is that I feel like thats not fair, because no one would want to see me naked (not that im interested in selling nudes) and shes Literally a model so tons of people will definately watch her nudes. Obviously, my opinion is stupid and probably wrong, but it still makes me feel like shit and idk what to do and how to tell her that i would really like her not to sell her nudes. Basically what im looking for is advice on either, how to get over that insecurity about other guys/girls seeing her naked OR someone to tell me if its okay for me to be upset by this? im so conflicted, because on one hand, i want us to remain exclusive and feel comfortable in our relationship, but on the other, I dont want to keep her from doing something that she might want to start doing for money one day. also please tell me if i would be an asshole for trying to get her to not get into that kind of stuff. If my issue isnt clear, feel free to ask any question.

First, it's ok for you to be upset by this. Second, you can not control the actions of other people, but you can control your response. If your gf goes through with this, you have a choice, be ok with it, or not. If you choose not, it is acceptable for you to dump her for her actions that you expressed to get that you don't agree with strongly. Life is about choices, hers and yours.

15F here. So a little over 3 weeks ago my parents told my brother (9M) and I that they were going out for a while to see some friends and May end up spending the night somewhere. Didn’t really think much of it at the time and but they haven’t been home since and I’m not sure what to do. They’re not missing. I’ve texted both of them multiple times now and they always respond, and I’ve even FaceTimed my mom several times and it’s definitely her and she seems totally okay. But when I ask them where they are or when they think they’ll be coming home they just sort of avoid the question. I’m starting to get really worried, especially since they now saying I should use their credit card they left here to like, buy groceries if I need to, which I’m taking to mean they’re not coming back for at least another week. I have no idea what to do. Do I call the police? Again they’re not missing, they just won’t come back home for some reason. But my brother is starting to get worried now too. If anyone has any advice please do share it because I’ve never been this confused in my life UPDATE - I posted this update earlier as it’s own post, but it was removed as updates are supposed to be added to the original text unless they are asking for additional advice, which mine was not. Here’s the original update however: Hey everyone. I just wanted to make this post so that you all know what’s going on now and that we’re okay. My grandparents are here at the house with us now. They called back as soon as they got the voicemails I left and immediately started heading this way. I feel a lot better now that they are here. They called the police once they got here. They talked to them, I talked to them. All that we really did is tell them everything I said in the original post I made and showed them my texts with them. We don’t have much more information then that. My grandpa called our dad and I think he actually spoke to one of the police officers. I don’t know what he said though, other than he still won’t tell anybody where they are. So we still have no idea what they’re doing or why they left. I promise I’ll make another update when I know more. Please have patience though. I’m trying to cooperate with an investigation now. They’re bringing the police dogs over to sniff around the house and I’m so nervous and I don’t even know why. This post is really just to let everyone know that our grandparents are here now and we are fine and alright. And I just want to thank everybody for helping out and being so supportive. And was really freaking out last night and I appreciate all the kind words. I’ll update when I can

For your safety-do not give out any information (location or phone number)to anyone asking on this thread or in a private message.

Disclaimer: Throw away, because my Step dad and his friends are active on reddit. On mobile as well. TW: Incest, sex, high risk pregnancy, mention of death. My mom had me at 18 right out of high school. long story short my dad died at 19 while he was away at uni. Then my mom re-married at 21 and had my sisters. My step dad, we’ll call him Scott, was the only father I’ve know, he’s been a great father, nothing out of the ordinary. Absolutely perfect parenting until I turned about 19. I remember Scott was becoming a little more touchy then normal, and a little too personal. He would offer me wine (I declined) and would ask me about my sex life after one too many glasses. I bushed it off because I thought maybe he was being a nosey father and just wanted to make sure his daughter wasn’t having sex? Then, this kind of stuff continued, to the point where my step dad tried to kiss me last year. I told my mom and she just laughed and told me “that’s how he gets after too many drinks” I knew then I had to make plans to leave, so I started saving up. After that incident things died down a bit until my mom got pregnant at 39. It’s a higher risk pregnancy so she’s on a lot of bed rest, and taking extra care of herself per her doctor. A couple weeks ago, my mom and Scott sat me down and told me her doctor said she should avoid sex during her pregnancy due to various health reasons I won’t get into. They asked me if I could have sex with Scott just until she was able to have sex again. Of course, I said no! I was livid, I was crying. She told me she’d be okay with it, and she’d be in the room as well. I told her that was even worse! Like what are they thinking? I have enough money now for an apartment, I got approved, I’m signing my lease next week. My parents are ignoring me and the whole house it full of tension. My younger sisters don’t understand what’s going on and my mom told me not to say anything. But my sisters are smart they know something is really up, and won’t stop asking me about it, especially the oldest. She came to me crying today and told me I better tell her what’s going on right now. I didn’t say anything. So any advice? What do I tell her? What do I say to the younger ones? How do I tell a 16 year old about this without being inappropriate or bashing my parents?

You need to call CPS. Actually, those are children who are growing up in the same incest/sexual abuse environment. He needs to be away from you, and your younger sisters. I’m sorry you’re going through this.

I’m a line cook. I go smoke by the dumpsters a few times a day. We get seagulls in our parking lot- it’s a well known restaurant, it’s busy, and tourists are sloppy with their fries. I also suspect the tourists are feeding the seagulls bc it’s “cute” even though it’s very against the rules. Regardless, the gulls do not fear man or god. They are used to people. A few weeks back, one of the gulls swooped down and took my cig. I think he thought it was a French fry. I giggled, and went about my day. However, it’s happened a few times since. I know it’s the same guy because he has a dark spot on his chest. I call him The Pestilence. I’m concerned he is now addicted to nicotine. He’s by the dumpsters at the same time as my breaks, every single day. This is obviously not good for him, and I’m getting mad about him bumming off me because smoking is expensive. Do I try to quit smoking? I’ll make noise and try to appear large to scare him off, but The Pestilence is hip to my tricks. Have work crack down on tourists feeding the gulls? What do I do? Are there sonar weapons, such as a dog whistle type of thing, that I could employ? Sorry this is fucking stupid. I’m being bullied by a seagull. He also stole a $10 bill from my coworker. It’s very rural, so we don’t have animal rescues and animal control just laughed when we called. Any advice welcome, and yes, I am serious. He sucks but I care about wildlife and he’s probably too young to be smoking Update: dying that this blew up. The Pestilence was off today due to rain, but I am going to get photos and/or videos of our gulls for y’all- I’m off a freakish amount next week, but I will try when I am in. thank y’all for the advice, and for the laughs - I’ve been a bit down lately and it’s much appreciated. Thanks for the awards, but please donate to rural animal rescues instead- we clearly need it, their DARE programs obviously sucks. And do also donate to a women’s shelter if you assumed I’m a man- I’m just a mess of a woman, it’s easy to get those confused. And also, yes, I am a writer, and am about to try to publish a chapbook (that’s a different advice post I still gotta make tho). Once again, thank y’all - I will tell The Pestilence he has fans, but, again, he’s a terrible listener and can’t understand my accent. Have a great night, and pray for me even though we all know God is laughing at my misfortune.

National Geographic says seagulls don’t like “bright, scary owl faces on masks or balloons”. Obviously smoking in a mask isn’t gonna work but I really want you to try a balloon. It also suggested mirrors, wind chimes or hanging like an old cd to reflect the sun.

***UPDATE*** Since someone asked me to update everyone on this mess here it goes. I told my fiancee it's over. I can't be with someone who abandons their kid because they're gay. That's just something I'm not willing to accept or forgive. I got her an AirBnB for the next month and gave her cash to rent an apartment after that month is over and I'll move her stuff when she gets her own place. I know this is probably too generous considering she just kicked out her kid without any remorse. But I'm not her. I'm not capable of doing that. Especially since I still love her despite what she did. She left an hour ago. I called her daughter and explained what happened. I told her she can move in with me. She was super happy and asked me to pick her up in a couple of hours. I'm not her father and I never had any kids of my own but I'll try my best to take care of her both financially and emotionally. Raising a teenager will definitely be a challenge but one that I'm happy to accept if it means she doesn't have to go through what I went through when I was her age. For the people that said to call CPS or to get legally custody of her, there's no point. In my country a 16 year old isn't considered a minor anymore. Which means she can legally live with anyone she chooses without parental consent. And as far as adopting her or getting legal custody, I'm not her dad. I wouldn't pretend to be. I'll just take care of her till she wants to or is ready to move out. I really hope that both of them reconnect. But my fiancee isn't welcome at my house anymore. I don't want her in my life. I haven't told my fiancee that her daughter is going to be living with me. If her daughter chooses to tell her herself that's her choice. I'm not going to force her to reconnect or keep in touch with her mother. I appreciate everyone's advice on this. I never thought Reddit would be this helpful. ***ORIGINAL POST*** I've been with my fiancee for 4 years. I'm 30 and she's 39. She has a 16 year old daughter. They moved in with me after we've been together for about 6 months. I never really got involved with the parenting of her daughter. It wasn't my place and I never had kids so I don't have any experience especially with teenagers. Two years ago I caught her daughter with another girl when I came home from work. She begged me not to tell her mom so I didn't. It's not my place to discuss her sexuality. Yesterday her daughter came home from school with a girl and came out to her mom. She flew into this rage and started cussing and calling her daughter names. And then she kicked her out and told her not to come back till she's "normal". My fiancee is very Christian. So to her being gay is a sin. I tried to reason with her but she doesn't care. She doesn't want to see her daughter again. Her daughter went to stay with her girlfriend and her parents. I've been in contact with her and told her I'd try to persuade her mom to let her back in. But I don't see that happening. I don't know what to do. I'm honestly disgusted with the way she reacted. I don't want her daughter to be homeless. She's a good kid and our relationship has been pretty good. Any advice would be much appreciated. And I apologize for any grammar errors English isn't my first language.

You'll have to live with the weigh of your decisions for the rest of your life, so choose carefully. Do you really want to be in a relationship with an homophobe that kicked out her own kid ? The decision is up to you, but ultimately, you know your fiancée was 100% wrong. Her reaction was so strong, do you think she will calm down, and change her mind ? Do you really want to stay around to figure it out ? IMO, kicking your own kid out and rejecting her like that is unforgivable. I wouldn't be able to live with such a person that abandon her own flesh and blood just because some church told her to. Her religion is more important than her family : will she be on your side if you ever get in such a conflict ?

I, 28f, am currently 19 weeks pregnant. My partner, 29M, and I are very excited, as this is our first baby and we have been trying for a few months. We announced the pregnancy a month ago at a dinner party we hosted, and everyone seemed surprised and overjoyed. My sister, 35f, who I will call K, immediately burst into tears and asked me how I could do this to her. I stared at her, and asked “What?” She started ranting, saying that I always got everything I wanted (which is not true, I worked hard for all that I have) and that she knew I got pregnant just so I could rub her infertility in her face. She screamed at me for 5 minutes about how I didn’t deserve to be a mother and she should be the one pregnant right now. My parents left with her soon after, and the party was basically over. I was really disturbed by my sister's reaction, because we had been pretty close before, and she had never done anything like this. K called me the next day, apologizing for how she acted at my announcement and asked if we could meet up for coffee. I accepted. We met up and she pretended as nothing had happened. Then she started a big speech about her infertility, how heartbreaking it is to be growing life inside of her, just to lose it, and how she had always wanted children of her own. She then proceeded to ask me if I could consider getting an abortion, to make things “fair”, or letting her adopt my baby. I stared at her and asked if she was serious. K said she was. I just dropped my part of the bill on the table and left. L texted me a rant that night about how I’d made K cry, and how all they wanted was to be parents, and that this meant so much to them, and I “owed” them for being more successful than them. I and my partner invested many years into our jobs, and we have worked very hard to earn what we earn now. I told them that my partner and I had been hoping for kids too and that I was not giving up my baby. He hung up. She later sent me a long letter (4 pages) about how she had always wanted to be a mother, and could I consider either abortion or letting her adopt my baby, how I should care about my older sister's happiness, how she would make a better mum, how the oldest kid should have the first grandchild, and how I could always just have another baby since it was "so easy for me to conceive". After that, she quieted down some, and I thought we were done with this. Except... it wasn't. She had posted MY SONOGRAM on her FB, and captioned it “L and I are expecting! We can’t wait to meet our little princess!” I was seeing red. I texted her and demanded she takes the post down. No reply.\`\` I texted L. No reply. So I called my mother and told her what happened. She was able to make K take the post down, luckily enough. K has called me petty for calling my mum and has continued to demand I give up my baby. I sent her a letter explaining that I had had enough of her nonsense, I AM keeping my baby, and that I recommend she get some help. I added that if she continues, I will not hesitate to call 999. This weekend, however, was the absolute last straw. My mum and dad have the spare key to my house, and while she was over at their house for brunch, she took the key. While my partner and I were at work, she broke into our house and stole all the clothing, blankets, nappies, bottles, and pretty much any other item we had bought for the baby, except furniture. It was later returned after my mum found it in her car. I called 999, but they told me I couldn't do anything because I had no proof and because it was all returned. My partner and I are moving in April, but I'm still scared my sister will find out where we live and take my child. I get that she's upset and jealous, due to her infertility, but that shouldn't mean I have to give up my baby. My parents know about this, and they have been doing their best to get her some help. She doesn't want to adopt, because she wants a child that's her own flesh and blood. I'm due in August, and the stress she's causing cannot and will not be good for me or the baby. My partner is looking into a cease-and-desist letter. Is there anything else I should do or say? I'm scared for my baby. **UPDATE 28-3-22** The support I've received from this website is overwhelming! Thank you all for your comments, although I couldn't reply to all of them, they are appreciated! We have had the locks changed, cameras installed, and a Ring doorbell. I've started saving every letter and screenshotting every message my sister has sent and plan to take them to court for a restraining order very soon. We have also been seriously documenting everything. My husband and I are planning a trip to Ireland for our anniversary next week, and it's going to be good to clear our heads from my sister. I've called 999 to report her for harassment, and they gave her a warning. She's contacted me saying that if I won't give her my child, I can at least pay for multiple rounds of IVF, which I have not replied to other than refusing. She's been begging my parents to convince me to give up my baby, which they refuse to do. They have also been given a statement that basically says that if they give her my contact information, they will not see my baby, to which they have agreed. I've since changed my phone number, and we are moving very soon. My sister does not know our new address. She actually stood on our stoop for 20 minutes a few days ago, banging on our door, and yelling. My husband opened a window and told her that if she didn't leave, he would let the dog out, and threatened to call the police. We have a rather small, but hyper puppy who jumps on everyone and barks a lot, and she is quite scared of dogs, actually, so this made her leave. I started working from home last week, as did my husband, and we've followed the advice of one of the comments, washed all of the baby stuff, as well as made sure none of the food in our kitchen was messed with (none was, luckily). We're planning on getting a restraining order as soon as possible, and are looking forward to our trip! I'm already sick of being pregnant, and I'm not even in the third trimester. I just want my baby. Thank you all again for your wonderful advice, and I may update you again when the baby is born.

Your sister is mentally ill and needs help. I don't say that as a joke or to insult her, she's sick and dangerous. Honestly, I think your fears are well founded. I would block her on everything and give you parents VERY STRICT orders that if you find out they've given her access to any info about your living situation or pregnancy that you will be forced to cut them all off for your safety. I'd also go talk to a lawyer to see if there's anything you can do to protect yourself here - in the US you can get a restraining order so that the person will be arrested if they come near you. Last though would be to make sure you have cameras recording your new place.

I told my roommate that I got my older brother a meteorite for Christmas. He started laughing and said it was really random/strange to get a meteorite for someone. I asked if he thought it was a bad gift and he said no but he was still laughing. I thought it was nice. Is it weird? Edit: I think the way I wrote my question might have made my roommate sound rude maybe? My roommate is actually a really nice guy. A lot of people want me to post an update after christmas about whether my brother likes it so I will probably do that :) . UPDATE! My brother loved it :) he wanted to know where he could read up more about the specific meteorite that I got for him (which dropped in spain). Thanks for all the encouragement everyone.

I don't think that's weird.. sounds like a cool gift to me. Cooler if he's into space and whatnot, but even if he's not, still a neat gift.

Please for the love of god do not stay with that woman. She is sick. Who the hell does that to someone they love?

[Here's my original post.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/kdvg78/how_do_i_make_my_toddler_afraid_of_someone/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3) (really hope this is allowed.) Guys. First of all, thank you. I can't say that enough. Thanks to so many of you who commented different organizations who could help my daughter and I, we are now safe. I got in touch with a few organizations and one of them was able to get my daughter and I on a plane on Christmas Eve. I left our things, with the exception of whatever we could fit in two suitcases and left without saying a word. We arrived that night and some amazing people from the organization were there to pick us up and take us to housing. We can stay here for up to 18 months, but I totally plan on getting on my feet before then. They have childcare, connections to lawyers, psychologists... Everything we need. They had an apartment ready for us, with a Christmas tree and everything. They had presents for my daughter to open on Christmas morning and even a couple for me as well. We have now been here for 6 nights and for the first time since my daughter was born, I have had a full nights rest. I have talked to a lawyer who is helping me get an order of protection so that if we were ever found, I know I will be protected by the law. I feel like I can do anything. I can go to school, I can get whatever job I want, I can spend time with my daughter without being in fear. This is such a blessing. I feel like I can live my life. For the past 2 1/2 years, I have been stuck in the mindset that to protect my daughter and myself, I couldn't act young. It was work and home every. single. day. Getting to separate myself from my terrible situation made me realize that I can be a responsible mother for my daughter and be 20 years old. I get to enjoy being a young a parent. It doesn't have to be so scary. So once again, thank you to everyone who helped. I wish I could hug every single one of you in person. I am eternally grateful. And so I don't break any rules of the subreddit... Any advice for a young mom in a new city?

That's fantastic! Just in case the organization that's helping you hadn't mentioned this, if you have an unusual name, it might be worth going by a more common nickname for anything that touches the internet for awhile. Once you feel up to it, do a couple web searches as of you were trying to find someone with the name the abuser knew you by. Based on how many other people online use that same name, you can then decide whether you'd be "difficult enough" to find if you keep using it as you start doing more public activities like work, civic involvement, making new friends and joining them in various online groups, etc.

[UPDATE](https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/g9xyrp/update_my_aunt_killed_my_grandma_by_infecting_her/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share) My Gramma and I are insanely close. She's called me every single day for as long as I can remember. Once I got a cellphone at 13, she and I spoke multiple times per day and saw each other frequently. I'm 28 now and she just turned 70 on the 12th. My aunt's work facility was infected with covid-19. It was in another building so she was very lax about everything. She lives in a duplex with my Gramma with my Gramma living above her. She didn't use any precautions. She went to the store often, she would go up and visit my grandma even though my Gramma begged her to stay downstairs until the pandemic was over. My dad even gave them both n95 masks which my aunt never used. My Gramma is a heavy lady, she's got diabetes and her breathing was already not great. My Gramma was admitted to the hospital last week and she spent her birthday in the ICU. She died twice last night and they did CPR and used a defibrillator to bring her back. Now she's on a ventilator and things aren't looking good. I didn't even get to say goodbye. I haven't actually seen my grandma since Christmas due to me working over time and then in March we went into lockdown and I didn't want to risk getting her sick. My aunt has been crying nonstop and feels horrible and wants me to call her but I have her number blocked. I don't want to talk to her. She's also sick with the virus and I wish it was her dying and not my Gramma. I fucking hate her and I don't care if she wants me to talk to her, I never want to see her again. My father and my brother think I'm cruel and that her guilt is heavy enough for them to forgive her but it's not for me... but I am starting to feel guilty as well. My aunt did everything with my grandma and really doesn't have any friends. Idk.

Your feelings are justified. Give it a couple weeks and see how you feel then

Last year, my husband discovered Destiny’s Child. I don’t know how he wasn’t aware of them before, but that’s beside the point. He obviously didn’t have this obsession before we were married. In fact, we have been married for 7 years, and he’d never exhibited any signs of obsessive behavior before this. Now, his obsession is taking over both of our lives and costing us a lot of money. He spends all day on eBay bidding on Destiny’s Child merch. He is always the highest bidder, so it’s very expensive. He is only subscribed to streaming services so he can listen to them. He bought a Bluetooth shower speaker so he can listen to them while he bathes. We cannot have one conversation without him saying something like, “You know, this actually reminds me of a Destiny’s Child lyric.” He’s spent hours watching YouTube tutorials, learning the choreography from every video. He makes me sit down and watch him dance in front of the TV to make sure his form and timing are perfect. He emails the members often, begging them for a reunion tour. He has also sent them birthday gifts in the mail. I would like to point out that his obsession is not sexual in any way— he just thinks they’re really cool. I’m almost to my wit’s end. I feel like I can’t escape Destiny’s Child and have lost my husband completely to this obsession. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Update: My husband had an MRI yesterday. He reluctantly agreed to it, because he knew I was absolutely terrified and anxious. No tumor, thank goodness. Everything was normal. He is finally beginning to understand how seriously I take this and how much of a problem it’s become in our marriage. He has agreed to visit a therapist. Hoping for the best! Thank you all for your wonderful advice, it means the world.

I quickly glanced through the comments and didn’t see this mentioned. I would go to the hospital to check for tumors. One day my cousin had very bizarre obsessive behaviors and it turned out he had a large tumor in his brain. I’m no doctor but quick changes in personality behaviors could always be something medical. I hope you find peace with this soon! My thoughts to you.

No one even has a clue the money is missing but I just can’t hide it anymore.... I just posted this to vent and maybe help with my anxiety I stole it and fed my gambling addiction... I am ready for any consequences that come my way though I know o have to man up to it but it’s just stressful and hard. I don’t even know how to start the conversation. ***update*** I’m literally waiting outside my bosses office to finally deal with this. I understand what everyone is saying and I appreciate the support but I gotta do what in my heart feels like the right thing for someone who has taken care of me this whole time... I will let you all know what happens after Thanks again all.... ***third update*** I am not in jail yet and I am waiting to hear if I am being charged. I know everyone was saying not to do it, get a lawyer and everything but honestly I am a good person who just made a bad decision. I could have kept on hiding it but eventually it would have caught up to me. Living everyday with that dirty secret not knowing if and when you will caught honestly was eating me alive in my mind. It was just a matter of time before I would have been found out. For the last couple of months I was gambling every penny I had just to win it back... I went to seek help today and I will continue with trying to fix myself so I don’t make the same mistake again. The losing after the gambling is what made me wanna die. And it was a feeling in the moment, if any of you can understand that. I will update as everything in this situation unfolds. If you private message me or try to chat there are like a hundred so I am sorry if I don’t respond it’s just a bit overwhelming. ***Fourth update*** My life has been such a rollercoaster these past couple weeks. So much has gone on... just wanna tell you all I’m not in jail...things are so tough right now for me so I have just been too depressed to even post. Thanks for all your support sorry to leave you hanging. There’s so much more to this and I am just trying to keep my head up...

Tell him you stole $4,999. That’s a different class of felony. 👍

So just over 4 months ago I gave birth to my 4th and last child, It was a high risk pregnancy and the birth was very difficult, I wont go into detail as it is still hard for me think about, Me and baby are both fine now. My doctors advised me that it would be best to not have anymore kids and I agreed, My husband just recently had a vasectomy and is now recovering. My sister and her boyfriend have tried planning for a family for awhile but recently found out she can't conceive, She has been very upset about this and I do feel sorry for her. Our family mentioned adoption or surrogacy for them and even though my sisters boyfriend was on board my sister said she needed time to think. Well a couple nights ago my sister called me to tell me her and her boyfriend had agreed on surrogacy and we talked for a bit, after awhile she brought up the fact how I had done so well in all my pregnancies and how I must have loved being pregnant. I knew exactly where this was going and reminded her how my last pregnancy was and yet her she told me everything was fine now so what was my issue. I told her that even though I'm around now I wont put myself through that again and just because I am fine now doesn't mean everything will be fine the next time. She then straight up asked me if I will be her surrogate or not, I straight up told her no, she then started screaming into the phone about how selfish I am and how I need to look out for my sister and help her when she needed it. I then told her I would help her with anything else but I was not putting my own health at risk and potentially leave my kids without a mom and my husband a widow, My sister went on to continually scream about how selfish I was being and how much a bitch I was being, I hung up on her, I didn't think about it and went to bed. The next morning my phone was blown up with fb messages and calls from friends and family, My sister had gone on fb after I hung up on her and she went and bitched on fb about me, She went on about how I wouldn't let her being a mom and how I had 4 kids while not being a nice sister and give her a baby, I was apparently being selfish. My mom and small handful of people are extremely angry at me and calling me all sorts of names for being selfish, while my dad, brothers and several other people are taking my side. Everyone on my sister's side don't want to hear my side of the story they think I'm doing this for my own selfish intentions and not my health. My mom and dad have been fighting back and forth now because my dad wont take my sister's side, and this is exactly like when were kids, my mom would always take her baby's side, I'm extremely pissed off that this has caused problems to the point my sister gets family involved. I should not have to put my own health at risk for her. I don't think I'm being selfish at all, but I'm not sure how to fix this Edit 1: I will not give up or "donate" one of my kids to my sister

You can’t because you’re not in the wrong here. There’s absolutely nothing selfish about not putting your life at risk, and you have children and husband that need you around as well.

A few days ago my sister(29) killed herself, but before she did she called me and said to take her daughter (the father is a domestic abusing piece of shit, no way in hell im letting him have her) Thing is, i am a single homeless 24 year old man, i have no car, no money no nothing, i’m only managing myself enough to finish uni, my friends and university helped me and gave me 1500$ so i can go pick up my niece and they said they’ll help me out to get a job asap, and temporarily housing me & my niece. I have my niece with me right now, were in a coffee shop and i bought a cake for her but she’s not eating it, she hasnt eaten anything in the last day or so, shes stopped smilling after i told her what happened to her mom. honestly, i have no clue what to do, i have absolutely 0 clue on how to talk to children let alone care for one and be a good parent (or uncle for that matter) I’m thinking of taking her to children’s therapy to help her process this trauma and make sure she’s okay and getting past it and all that, but now, how do i take care for a 9 year old girl?

You should head over to r/legaladvice. Even though she gave you her daughter there are some serious legal issues you will need to take care of pronto. The pos father could get you for kidnapping without the right documents etc.

First off let me start by saying i do not know what im typing, i do not know what im thinking, i have never felt like this before. Im not mad, not sad, not angry, not happy, ive never fult such nothingness before. Anyways i have the rest of this month and the next month in my current home. After that im going homeless. All i have is a car and a few assets that can get a few bucks but not much to my name. I dont know if im allowed to talk about suicide but im going to be honest in my post; if the time comes and i havent found any hope or even a step 1, im going to kill myself. I dont want to die, but i dont want to live this life. I am not depressed or anxious or whatever, im good in the head, but recent events have taken their toll on me. Forgot to mention thje important details, i am 19, just finished my first semester in Computer Science in university (and probably my last semester) and i do not work. I live in Lebanon. I do not have a passport to another country. I do not have anyone that can support me. I am completely alone and have a bit of money(1-2k ish) left if i sell my car and all i own. &#x200B; I guess the advice im asking for here is what should i do? Is there any hope? also please note i live in Lebanon; basically shit internet, shit electricity, no social benifits or whatever no nothing. This country is worse than a 3rd world. i probably miswed a lot of important details, but im struggling to think straight. Feel free to ask me anything (doesnt matter if its personal) related to the matter. Thank you for reading my reddit post. have a good day. &#x200B; Edit: I cannot begin to explain how i feel. I never thought anyone would care this much. I am not good with expressing myself but thank you to each and everyone who replied. It really is helping way more than you think. This is going to be a ramble but here goes. As to everyone asking me not to give up, i hope i dont. i want to figure this out and be on top i really do. i will try my best. i hope on day in the future i can come back and update you guys with a happy ending. i havent cried in a long time and you guys have brought emotions i thought were long gone. so thank you for that. I am trying to reply to every single reply but so many are coming in so fast, so for those that i miss, i am very sorry. Eventually i will get to it and i thank you in advance. So for those who are interested, i have concluded from all the replies a general plan that i would like to share for some criticism. First thing i should do is find a job, which i am trying my best to do. After i find a job i will try and find the cheapest/best rent i can and live on the bare minimum while saving up as much as i can. Now here is where i get a little lost. i know i should get a certain amount of money before considering immigration but have no idea what estimate that consist of, so help on that would be amazing. Next i will contact embassies (Canada and Sweden have been good suggestions so far) for help regarding immigration or a student visa. Also any help regarding immigration would be amazing as i have no clue how all that works. now that im typing that i feel like im asking for too much. i really dont deserve the support you guys have given me today, i cant thank you enough. Anyways that is the general plan, and i know for a fact once i land in a country better than Lebanon i will thrive. i know i can. All i need is a half decent government behind me that wont steal my money. thats it. i dont want rights, i dont want jack shit. i just want my hard earned money. So yeah this is probably the worst paragraph of words to read, so for those of you who did, thank you. My brain is barely functioning i feel like now, so this took a lot of energy to type. Thank you yet again to each and every single one of you. i mean it. I hope to update you guys soon on what happens. &#x200B; Edit 2: I think i have finally replied to every single comment i got. If i get more replies during the night i will answer them tomorrow. I wanted to say thank you again everyone for everything you did. Also to everyone asking to donate, please go donate that money to a charity of your choice. I will be going to bed now, and i wanted to emphasize how much this all means to me. You guys changed me today. Thank you again. i cannot say that enough. I hope one day i will be posting an update with a happy ending. Thank you for your best wishes and hope to talk to you again soon reddit. &#x200B; Edit 3: Hello everyone, i just woke up and got a shower and hopped on the computer. I am still in shock with everyone's support. i still cant thank you enough. I am reading through all the comments but i am afraid i do not have enough time to reply to all of them. I just want you guys to know i am reading your comments and i appreciate it way more than you think. Today is a big day for me; will be roaming around looking for jobs, need to setup some emergency foods and such. Lots to do today. Your support is giving me strength beyond what i thought i had. You guys have proven that people still care, there is hope. I will be updating you whenever i can, as i now consider you guys my friends. Also dont forget im reading your replies, and i really really appreciate it very much. Regarding looking for online jobs, i will try to make up a decent resume of sorts when i get back home and see what i can find. I really shouldn't be asking for more help from you guys, as you have done way more than enough, but i thought id ask ; i still have a few bucks remaining in my paypal, nothing worth cashing out though i was wondering if maybe like i can invest it or gamble it or of the sorts. Im obviously not counting on it, neither am i a gambler, just trying to give an example. Just a thing i can try my luck in see if it can help. Again, thank you to each and everyone one of you. i keep repeating myself but as i keep saying, im bad at expressing myself. I just want you guys to know i really appreciate everything. Will update you soon, have a good day everyone.

My friend what part of Lebanon are you in ? I live in the northern part next to Tripoli. Maybe I can help you out with something. Have all your family members passed away?

I have been preparing to defend my cruiser weight belt against a young man from Pakistan. I found him to be a very likeable individual and struck up a friendship with him. He revealed to me that he was a closeted gay (which there are still some taboos about in boxing given the fact it is a blood sport and aids). Although, I have little knowledge of the LGBT community, I felt honoured that he trusted me enough to share this. I then did something rather foolish, I sent him an arrogant text telling him that “if you can take my crown, you would make a great ambassador for our sport.” A couple of days later he came out openly as gay to his family and community on Facebook. A short while after this, I have heard that he has been found dead and it is looking like one of his uncles is has murdered him. I feel sick at this and responsible for having possibly encouraged him to come out as gay.

It's horrible what happened but you have no responsibility. He came out the closet, you didn't out him.

Didn’t know where to post this. Sorry if it’s the wrong place. I just wanted to get it off my chest in a way. At uni years ago, I lived in a big house share at the top of the house. One night I was asleep and awoke to some noise coming into my room. It was the sound of one of my female flat mates that also lived on the top floor. She had just got home from a drunken night out. She was completely all over the place. She was whispering for me to wake up. I was still half asleep and expected her just to leave. Next thing I know I realised my blanket had been removed from on top of me. She had grabbed my penis and was attempting to give me a blow job. I pushed her away. She kept coming back and grabbing at my penis. She was quite forceful and aggressive and kept begging me to please let her suck me of. I was really grossed out by the situation. And by the fact that this girl always tried to give off an air of superiority of moral ethics over everyone else. And yet here she was trying to force herself on me sexually. I managed to get her off and out of my room. At which point a few minutes later I could hear her snoring loudly in her room which was across the hall. She snores extremely loudly. I never really thought about it much after. It was never mentioned. I was so embarrassed by what had happened. And I never knew whether she was too drunk to remember. Years have passed. We lost touch. She was very toxic and I distanced myself. Only to then discover she is now a leading female empowerment activist for refugees and minorities. And gives talks on all of this. It makes me sick to think of what she did to me. And here she is now talking out against the exact type of things she is guilty of trying to do herself. If a guy had done this to a girl at uni they would have been kicked out most likely. I can’t help but think if I had said anything no one would have believed me especially as it was a number of years ago now. But seeing her now trying to come across as this saviour of morality makes me feel nauseas. I feel frustrated that I still find it difficult to move on and just forget about it. I know if I ever confronted her maybe for some weird kind of closure or something, she would just deny it. I’m not sure how to feel about this and i think that’s why I’m writing. If I am over blowing feeling this way and I should just man up then please tell me. I just want to not feel such resentment as it’s bringing me down. But I don’t know how to. Thank you for reading. Edit: i really only expected a few replies, so this has overwhelmed me. I haven’t been able to thank everyone but I really appreciate all the replies. The funny thing is, this thread has been cathartic and almost helped to give me some kind of closure in a way which I never expected. Thanks so much for taking the time to reply.

My man, you need to think about what is going to help you here. If confronting her is going to bring you closure then I say you do it. Being too drunk to remember is not an excuse if you ask me. As for your fears about not being believed, I think you should definitely speak out, because a big part of fighting sexual assault is about listening to victims, listening to those who have been assaulted and not disregarding what they say. Lots of women have spoken out about their experiences being assaulted years after the fact. It shouldn't be somehow different just because you're a man. Lots of people are going to say stupid things along the lines of 'who turns down a blowjob' etc., those people are assholes and contribute to the kind of culture that sweeps assault under the rug. Just because you're a guy doesn't mean you're somehow always dtf or whatever. Take care.

Last night my grand father asked me to come over to his house, and he sat me down and explained his will to me. Evidentially he has had some falling outs with his children and other family members and wishes to leave the entirety of his estate to me. It was a lot to take in all at once but evidentially I will be receiving 923,000 in financial assets (bonds, IRA, savings, and cash) and a litany of properties worth roughly 1,200,000. Next week he plans on taking me to meet his accountant and financial advisor to get a better understanding of his various financial holdings, so I will have more context then. The advice I’m seeking is how in the world do I navigate the family members that feel cheated. I have a good relationship with all of his direct children. They will all be left enough to not legally contest the will, but I am sure they will be hurt/upset. Additionally any financial advice would be taken into consideration, but is not really what I’m looking for. TLDR; I am getting a large inheritance and don’t want to look like an asshole to those who feel cheated out of the inheritance.

Get a great lawyer, and watch your back. The good relationship you had with all of his children, that will be over soon enough. They will all, in the beginning, act very very nice to you, as if they are not bothered by the situation. But once they realize you will not be splitting all the money with them equally, they will become cold, spiteful, and all of the other things. Humans. What can ya do?

Original Post: https://www.reddit.com/r/Advice/comments/15cemi1/its_been_two_years_without_sex_with_my_wife_and/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=2&utm_term=1 After considering everyone’s advice and reflecting, I had a big talk with my wife. Here’s what happened. The Deadbeat question. Midday I asked her if she felt I could be doing more with my son or house upkeep. She said she appreciated me asking but felt we had a good balance. - Later that night I picked up dinner and read more comments. Decided to dig deep. Surprisingly, as I was getting out of the shower, my wife was waiting for me and asked if I wanted a BJ. (She’d known I was wanting since Wednesday but this was the first good moment with baby sleep and no massage work earlier in the day) I told her everything. Apologized for not giving more non-sexual intimacy. Apologized for sometimes feeling frustrated and piling onto the demands for her. Asked if she was feeling OK in her own body. Surprise for me: she wasn’t. She had something going on with her body that I didn’t know about. So she’s going to see a doctor about that thing. I asked her if she found it gross and off putting that I would ask for head in these tiny windows when the baby is asleep. She said not at all, only that she feels guilty when doesn’t feel up to it, but that it’s ok to ask. Then the best part- we had a long chat about prioritizing both solo time and date time. We had really let this thing get away from us, but with our son old enough, it was time to work on it. We fantasized about doing things again, even in short windows. We agreed to ease back into our sex life as it came. The second best part - she then gave me the deluxe blowjob package with all the fixins. She still isn’t ready to have her body touched sexually, so we stayed up to cuddle and watch a show. Thanks to everyone who told their stories and gave tough but true advise. Everyone that advised me to cheat, rethink your lives. People that pushed me to porn are like pushing beer to an alcoholic. I was clear it’s not good for me. And people who had an axe to grind on me like in some slob deadbeat, I’m sorry truly that there are so many models of this in your life that it’s the first thing you jumped to. Me and a lot of men have to do better. —- Edit: The majority of comments in this thread are about communication, but there’s one missing ingredient: self-awareness. You can talk for days and days and still miss your own blind spots. This was the gift that Reddit gave me, and I had to swallow my pride and see the uglier parts of myself.

Yay! What a great outcome, and a great example of how to communicate with your partner. Not everything should immediately go to divorce at the first sign of trouble. I wish you guys a successful marriage and your wife good health!

I’m 16 and a junior in high school I think I’m way past the need of a bedtime. If I’m not asleep by 9 my mom begins to scream at me and comes into my room in the middle of the night so see if I’m asleep. Is it even reasonable that she does this? I just want to sleep on my own schedule and that doesn’t seem like a problem for other parents so I don’t know why she cares so much. How do I tell her that me having a bedtime is completely fucking stupid. Edit: for commonly asked questions My grades are fine they’re around B’s and A’s I start school at 8:30 and it’s online so I usually wake up at 8:15 I don’t have a problem with waking up and set my own alarms Edit #2: Thank you for the advice everyone I will try to talk to my mom about extending my bed time or letting me wake up earlier. For a few more reoccurring questions and comments: I am not allowed to wake up anywhere before 8am because it wakes up my mom. She’s a light sleeper and gets pissed if she’s woken up. 15 minutes is good enough for me to do my morning routine before school. I have online school so it will take way less time for me but once I go back in person I will wake up earlier. Even though my bedtime is 9 I am not able to sleep so I usually stare at the ceiling for a few hours until I eventually fall asleep. My dad isn’t around to talk to my mom. They are separated and my dad doesn’t like talking to my mom at all.

You would have better luck trying to change your bedtime to 10 or 11 rather than trying to convince her to get rid of it.

I am 24 years old and am autistic so I understand that even though my autism is manageable its not always comfortable to be around me in public. I was taking the bus today to go visit my mom and I was sitting all the way in the back because sitting at the front where everyone is gives me panic attacks. Three teenage girls get on and come all the way to where I'm sitting and sit on the seats in front of me. We are all alone at the back. I am minding my own business looking out the window and notice them doing double takes and turning around and looking at me then turning back and learning in to whisper to each other and laugh. I ignored this because it happens sometimes. I dont always know how to behave 'normally' so it's ok. But I pause my music and hear them saying I'm a drug addict and a weirdo, probably because of my increasing anxiety at that point, and one of them pretends to take a selfie and instead takes a picture of me over her shoulder. Her friend tells her to stop after I become clearly agitated but she says "who gives a fuck he's a creep". Anyways I turn my music back on and try to ignore them making gestures at me for another 20 minutes or so until we disembark. I was so shaken up about the experience that I waited to be the last one to get off and was slow to get off the bus because I was frazzled and the bus driver ended up yelling at me to get off as well. I cried all the way to my moms house and couldn't explain to her what was wrong. What bothers me the most is those girls are probably sharing pictures of me on social media calling me a crack head or whatever when I was having a panic attack. I never said a word to them. Ive been sitting here feeling like garbage and thinking if it would be better to die. Just die. Thank you for reading.

Those girls are bully’s. I know its hard but try to ignore people like that. You are so much better than them.

So for some context i have known my bestfriend for 11 years now, and we've been spending most of our time together now because of quarantine. one day i show up at her house in a Metallica tshirt and a skirt that went to my knees, and her mother forces me to change after her boyfriend glances at me claiming i was making him uncomfortable. this gave me a really weird feeling but i brushed it off. fast forward a week or so i go back to her house in a literal turtleneck and jeans, and her mother looks me up and down and whispers in my friends ear. later i find out that that would be the last time we could hang out because she accused me of being a slut who slept around with lots of men, and that i was going to somehow steal her 50 yr old bf??? the whole situation makes me feel sick and hurt because i don't want to lose my besfriend for simply existing? To my friends mom i am seen as a threat to her, her daughter, and her boyfriend for absolutely no reason. Edit: I informed my mom about the whole situation (she was formally friends with my friends mom) and she told me that she has a multitude of mental problems and even accused my mother of being the reason her first husband left her. (He apparently had a fetish for latinas and both me and my mom are Brazilian immigrants) She’s been envious of my mom since they met and now I’m at a visually mature age she’s portraying it on me as well. She’s delusional and is going as far as spreading lies about me to other friends in our group and her other kids. I feel attacked and trapped in this situation and I just want a normal relationship with my bestfriend. I don’t know what to do next. Edit 2: my friend is not even allowed to come to my house because her mother had deemed me a bad influence for no other reason other than the way I look and the way my body is shaped. Something is seriously wrong with that woman and she was even hinting at my friend that me and her had sex(I am 100% heterosexual but my friend is lgbt) ??? What??? I’m so confused on what this adult woman has against me.

In other words she is afraid her boyfriend is a pedo

I(14f) have 2 sisters(8f) and(17f). My oldest sister was recently caught with her hand up our little sisters skirt and apparently she had been touching her for months. Ever since she was caught our family has been fighting nonstop with some saying that she needs to be on a list and others saying that she shouldn’t be punished because she isn’t 18 and is family. Me and my little sister are really close but now IM not allowed to be alone with her because my parents don’t trust me. I’ve been hanging out with my friends a lot more recently just to get out of the house and away from the arguments. I hate having to do this and I never get to spend any time with my little sister. I need advice.

17 is old enough to understand that molesting an 8 year old child is illegal and immoral. On a personal note, something happened to me between my female cousin and I when I was 9 and she was 12...still wrong but both children so no need for jail (it was not severe or repeated). 17 and 8 is a massive difference in brain development. Really no reason to give the benefit of the doubt at that age.

This is a whole cluster fuck so strap in. Also going to post on a legal sub. I (17f) was browsing tumblr one day when I came across this blog with a familiar face as the pfp- it was a girl from my school. She was 2 years below me and I didn't know her name, but we took the same bus and she was in some of the same classes as my brother. He was also friends with her cousin. At first I looked because I was curious but after a few posts, I realised this was a Ted Bundy stan account. I was very disturbed- most of it was cringy flower crown edits, but there was the occasional text post where she would say disgusting things about the victims and say she wish she knew a serial killer, etc, etc. At one point, I found a picture of bloody wrists and the caption led me to believe it was her. I ss every post and her pfp and anything that proved it was her and contacted our school. My hope was that they would intercept and talk to her and the parents about her online behaviour and get her help. I did it all anonymously and was told that she had been spoken to and action was being taken. That was the last I heard of it for around 5 months. I did check her account regularly because I was genuinely worried, but nothing else was posted other than a simple text post saying 'goodbye friends'. I thought that was the end of it until a month ago. I found out from my brother that she had committed suicide. I was devastated. I never really knew this girl yet I felt like I had lost someone. My brother (because he was in her year and had a connection to her) was getting updates as they happened from her cousin. Well, in her note, she blames the person who contacted the school (me) and says I was the reason she did this. Of course no one other than the school knows it's me, but I feel bad. I've been through this stuff before, and I know it's not my fault, but for some reason this hits different. There is more legal stuff that I need advice on, which I will post next on the right sub, but this is more for emotional support. How do I get over this? EDIT: wow it's the next day and there's a lot of messages to read. I can't reply to them all but I've read every single one of them. A lot of the advice was great- some of it terrible, but we'll skip that. I've been going to therapy for a couple of years but it's mostly been put on hold because of this damned virus. But there are online things I'm doing. Some people were actually angry that I didn't post of a legal sub afterwards- this is because it wasn't that deep and is being sorted out and legal subs aren't really that great to begin with. Also, the virus is kind of fucking up everyone and a dumb legal case is the least of anyone's worries. To the people saying it was my fault and I shouldn't have reported her, I don't know what to say to you. I saw myself in this girl and I did what I thought was right at the time. Her account (or blog) was public and I was concerned. There were a lot of disturbing posts. Sorry if that upsets you. I don't know what the school or her parents did so I can't comment but yeh. Thanks for the advice everyone EDIT 2: apparently what I did was a 'crime against humanity'. I-

If you don’t know you are drowning you are not going to ask for help. The bystander who sees the person drowning has an obligation to seek help. That help may come as a surprise to the person who then may feel resentment towards the one who called for help. Had you not called for help she would have drowned anyway. She may have taken others with her as she drowned. Someone else may have called for help. In the end she was drowning regardless of what you did. She saw suicide as a better option for whatever pain she was dealing with. It could have had a different outcome, but this is the outcome that happened.

u/Suitable_wing. I made a post about a situation that occured yesterday then I got a message from u/Suitable_wing asking me questions. He asked for my age and I told him that I was a teen. He then proceeded to ask me to touch my self inappropriately. I told him that doing that isn't gonna make me stop feeling like shit which he then says that he loves me. 😐😑😐. Bruh, you don't even know me.

Hi, if you haven't already you should report this to Reddit's admins and to the subreddit moderators.

Like a lot of people with mental illness,the pandemic has been making everything total garbage. I was already in a bad spot, and it's been getting worse and worse. I barely leave my room anymore. Now social media is filled with blm. It isn't a bad thing (it's good that people are doing stuff) but I go to social media for escapism. I don't want to think about all the shitty realities of my life right now. I follow people that have nothing to do with politics but that's the only thing they're posting now. I have nowhere to go, and I feel like I'd be the bad guy for trying to ignore what's happening. I know it's my responsibility as a poc to do something, but I really don't want to because mentally I'm in a bad place and all this is causing me too much stress. Does this make me a piece of shit? Edit: I did not expect such a huge response. Thank you guys for the kind words. It's hard to remember how overwhelming social media can be and I will take the time to focus on my mental health. Because of that, I think the most I can do right now in terms of activism is donate. I hope all the hard work people put in leads to change, and thank you again for responding!

having mental health issues and on top seeing all the negativity going on in the world through social media can be very draining. It’s OK if you can’t focus. It’s OK if you can’t be “productive. It’s OK if you feel overwhelmed. It’s OK if you’re exhausted. It’s OK if you’re confused. You’re human, and these are unparalleled times. Take care of yourself. The world needs you for the fight ahead.

Yesterday my fourteen year old sister left her phone unlocked. I went through it and there were videos of her killing animals in our backyard. There were videos of her stabbing two squirrels to death, after she killed them she stuck sticks through their bodies. Everyone thought our cat ran away but there was a video of her holding it's dead body. There were even videos of her cutting up fish from our fish tank and torturing them. I didn't tell anyone yet. What should I do? Edit: I'm going to tell my parents once I get the videos on my phone. UPDATE!!: I'm freaking out right now. I looked through her room, and I got in her laptop because she had a journal with all of her passwords written down. She sends the videos to other people on her Discord. I have the videos saved in my phone now and as soon as my mother gets home from work I will tell her. Pray for us. ANOTHER UPDATE: I told my mom everything that you guys told me to and I showed her the videos. She said next time to tell her first and she got my sister. My sister treated most of it like a joke and was trying not to laugh. My mom said my sister needs help and made me leave the room. I don't know what they talked about. Also on her Discord there were more things. A video of her crushing a fish in her bare hands until it was split into pieces, and taking pictures of the eyeball that fell off. Video of her putting a knife directly into a large fish's eye and spinning it around. Picture of another dead squirrel's face up close with a little blood on it's mouth. I wish I could show but I don't want the post to be taken down. My mom isn't telling me what she's going to do. I don't think she'll do enough to actually help my sister. All of her devices were taken, she made a big deal about it and tried to break my mom's door.

I'm a homicide investigator. Your sister needs help, before someone like me has to get involved. That kind of violence is unusual in females, but not unheard of. You have to tell your parents. Make them understand that unless they intervene quickly and properly, your sister is going to hurt someone, maybe even kill them. There's something called the homicidal triad. The 3 symptoms are starting fires, torturing animals, and bedwetting into adolescence. Idk about the fires because I haven't read all your replies yet, but I would be surprised if she hadn't. FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY, *DO NOT LET YOUR SISTER KNOW THAT YOU KNOW, OR THAT YOU TOLD YOUR PARENTS.* If you need help, my inbox is open.

I'm in complete mental turmoil. Long story short, I once had a nice, roughly 7 person very close friend group, one of us had a girlfriend and after they broke up she slept with me one night while we were both drunk at an afterparty (I apologized to the friend profusely for sleeping with his ex and we are on good terms now). Now she's moved on and is dating another one of my close friends, so yeah, she gets around the friend group quite well. Around a year ago, I noticed my friend (with the gf) start to get very distant from me, almost in a mean way. After a while I asked him why, he said his girlfriend didn't want him to talk to me (Understandable on both their parts, I am the guy that slept with his gf, and she likely didn't wanna see her one-night-stand too often) I took his word for it and moved on, okay. I later start noticing many, many people in our more distant friend group/ network start blocking me on socials or being straight up awful to me if I reached out to them. I found out that she had told people that I had R\*ped her. Naturally I was very confused as I had NOT, and we'd actually been somewhat decent friends after we'd slept together (taken classes together and went to a few more parties and whatnot). I tried to reach out to her but she had blocked me, as had all of her close friends so getting through to her would be very hard. Her friends started attacking my friends (who had been there that night and know that nothing bad went down) and it tore my friend group apart. Fast forward a year, and that original friendgroup is down to 3 (i'm fearing 2 soon enough) all my closer friends know I did nothing wrong but seemingly left as the drama was too much to deal with, and I understand that. The word seemingly keeps spreading and there seems to be no end in sight to the amount of harassments and hate i'll be getting, I have no idea what to do and I fear that things will only get worse from here as I slowly get ostracized from everything I had been a part of. What do I do? Edit: I've read through the whole thread, and will continue to do so as comments come in, thank you all for your help in trying to navigate this awful situation. Edit 2: With the exception of the friend with the gf everyone that knows both of us and both sides of the story believes me, my behavior and personality isn't consistent with this accusation, and hers is

Do you have any proof that she has written or emailed anyone with this? Or has she just told her current boyfriend and he has spread it around vebally. If she has written about it or any evidence that you can find then you can do something to refute that. If not then it is just a campaign on her part and she got her team of flying monkeys to do the work for her. If you have actual hate and harassments that you can prove then that is another thing that you can use to force her hand. You have a choice to walk away from all this and just start again without her in the picture at all, no friends that know her, and hope that it fades, or you can go on the offensive and ask her to stop or prove it as she is slandering you for her own reputation which will be that of a liar that is covering the fact that she has slept around with multiple men in her friend group, this could make it go much bigger than just your friend group.

Not even an hour ago. I’m free. I’m still shaking. I have audio recordings of him from tonight telling me he’s going to kill himself and frame me. Not much else to say, I’d just really like some words of strength & encouragement. Edit: Oh my gosh the love and support I’ve been shown from you guys is unmatched! I truly appreciate all of you. There’s so many comments, don’t worry I have read them all and I’m working on replying. Thank you so much for the suggestions & kind words. And for the hug awards!

You did the right thing. Block him on all forms of communication. If he attempts to contact you again, involve the police. Stay strong.

So! About two months ago I was Depression Shopping as one does and I may or may not have bought a $300 custom beanbag of Appa from Avatar: The Last Airbender. The dimensions were for an average beanbag chair and it finally arrived today and is INSTEAD the literal size of a full sized bed. When I say literal I deliberately mean “I spread this across my full sized bed and it is the size of the mattress itself.” What the hell do I do with this thing? [Here’s the Appa in question ](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/529062660407427072/743535114142744642/image2.jpg) and [here](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/529062660407427072/743550109727457390/image0.jpg) is where it was SUPPOSED to go. I have no room for this!! Is this just my mattress now? ETA the beanbag filling hasn’t arrived yet but I’ll post a pic when it does lol EDIT: good god this blew up LMAO to answer the most common question: this was custom made by an Ukrainian Etsy shop that no longer exists! I can’t return it because it took so long to arrive (I bought it on the first of June) and it’s exceeded the return policy. Thanks for the silver! I’m cleaning out a walk in closet to repurpose as a sort of mini room and I’ll be trying to fit this guy in there!! EDIT 2: I do intend to keep it now!! I might not be able to take it with me to college so if this is the case you all might see a sky bison pop up for sale in about a year EDIT 3: [Here](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/529062660407427072/743653365052866580/image0.jpg) is Appa’s temporary home until the filling arrives at which point I will have to find another option again. [Here’s a pic](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/529062660407427072/743653687662084157/image1.jpg) (+ [another](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/529062660407427072/743653687431266344/image0.jpg)) of how he looks filled via the maker! And to clarify: I’m 17F that had money saved up specifically to dick around with quit telling me to do illegal stuff?? im not tryna get sued for buyer’s remorse ft. Sky Bison 👀

That's quite a unique problem you have there. Since you're asking this question, I'm going to assume that simply returning the item is not an option for you. In this case, I see four possible options. **1)** **Water -** If getting some money back isn't a concern for you, then donating it or giving it to a friend as a gift is always an option. Imagine their surprise when they receive a giant sky-bison! **2)** **Earth -** Avatar: The Last Airbender has a big fanbase. If you post this in some online spaces like fan-sites or even here on Reddit, I'm sure it won't take long for you to find someone willing to purchase it from you. You can of course, also try posting it on Ebay or Craigslist. **3) Fire -** If you have any artistic / crafting skills, you could try to take apart the giant Appa, and convert it into an ornament that's small enough to fit inside your room. Maybe something that can hang on your wall, or a cushion that sits in a corner. **4) Air -** Shave your head, get an arrow tattoo, and accept your fate as the last airbender. **EDIT:** Added another option for you to consider.

\*Throwaway to protect myself.\* By the title, this probably sounds bad. It isn't, I promise you. A little background: I was raped when I was 17 and I became pregnant. My rapist has stalked me since he found out I was pregnant. My daughter is 2 1/2 now and we have had to move four times since she was born to stay away from him. I have an active restraining order against him, but it hasn't stopped him once and the police have not been very diligent. In their eyes he is just trying to see his daughter and they turn a blind eye, despite them being called multiple times because mine and my daughters lives were in danger after he broke into my home. Yes, this has happened more than once. I work a full time job to ensure my daughter and I have a place to live and because I have no help from family, my daughter goes to daycare. The daycare is fully aware of the active restraining order and have a photo of him on file. He showed up to her daycare last week and I have been too afraid to send her back this week and have taken off work, but if I want to pay my rent next month, I have to go back to work tomorrow. I trust my daycare. They recognized him immediately, called the police (who didn't do anything because he wasn't on the premises when they arrived), and then called me. So I know deep down that I can trust these people to protect my child and alert me if he shows up again, but I am still so scared. I don't know if this is the right thing to do, but I want my daughter to recognize him and be afraid of him. I want her to know to make noise and yell, scream, and cry if he is around so that hopefully if something were to happen, somebody would notice that something is wrong. How can I go about doing this? Is this the right thing to do? &#x200B; \*EDIT\* I have gotten some great advice. Thanks to many people who replied, I am working with an organization who is going to help move me far away possibly even before the end of this week. Thank you so so much.

I would suggest contacting your local battered womans shelter. They will be able to give you a lot of much needed resources and can be a powerful ally in getting you real protection and ending this stalking.

Okay, i'm using a throwaway because this whole thing is really starting to freak me out. I live in a small town in Florida. It's pretty small, and because of that i'm close to a small handful of my neighbors. Down the road there is this family that lives there, a mom and two daughters. I went over there the other day to see how they were doing, since it had been a couple days and I was feeling a little bored. The mother, Mary, was there, but I didn't see the girls. I asked where they were and she just looked kind of confused. She said Alex was in her room, as she was being really moody lately. But when I asked about her younger daughter, Sandy, she just looked confused, and maybe worried? She said she only had the one. I haven't gotten a good chance to talk to her eldest daughter, so I don't know if it's just the mom, but I asked a few of my other neighbors, and they just looked really confused, like I was spouting nonsense. It's really starting to freak me out. I can't find anything online about this kind of thing happening, I don't think. Her name is Sandy Beckett. What should I do? I know i'm certain she exists, i've talked to her so many times. She was a really sweet kid, and everyone just forgot her and she's nowhere to be found. &#x200B; Edit/Update: Woah, I didn't expect this to get as much attention as it did. Thank you to everyone who is concerned about my mental state, but unless I see anything else that might be a sign of some kind of illness or break such as schizophrenia, i'm going to hold off on going to a psychiatrist. I don't want to be committed against my will if i'm not crazy, and something is actually happening here. I'm getting alot of the same questions so I thought i'd clear a few things up, and give some more details about the situation. First of all, I'm absolutely sure that Sandy and Alex are two different people. Alot of you are saying that they're both short for Alexandra, and I might just be remembering wrong. I've seen them in the same room together, and interacting. (I think Sandy is short for Sandra anyway.) I'm also certain they're sisters, not cousins or friends or anything of that nature. When I first met the family, Mary introduced them as her daughters, and everything i've seen points to them being sisters. A few of you have questioned if I've seen Sandy age over the years, and I have. She's gotten older. She even got a haircut once, when she grew tired of her long hair. I should also probably give some more specifics about all of us. I'm 17, have lived here for quite some time, and don't really know much of a history of mental illness in my family. I don't know most of my family, so there might be, but beyond a bit of depression on my Dad's side, nothing big that I know of. As for drugs, beyond a little weed I took in the freshmen year of highschool, I'm not on anything like that. I don't know exact ages for the girls, but Alex is maybe 6 or 7, while Sandy was around 4. As for how often I see them, it varies. With the pandemic, I've seen them significantly less, but before all this I saw them roughly once a week. Sometimes I'd go a while without seeing them, and other times i'd see them just about every day. It evens out. Some other things I've seen in the comments include the carbon monoxide levels in my house. I'm not sure about how to check that but i'll definitely look into getting that checked out. If anyone has any other questions please feel free to ask me. I wanted to make this a follow up post, but i'm not exactly tech savvy, so this will have to do. Later today, i'm going to head over to their house again. I'm just gonna hang out with Mary, like i've done in the past, and at some point i'll say I need to use the bathroom, and then I'll check the hall for Sandy's bedroom. I'll let you know how that goes later today. Until then, thanks so much for all your concern, but for now I just need to figure out what's going on. **Edit/Update 2**: Okay, So as promised I went over to their house today. I didn't bring up Sandy again, and Mary seemed to either pretend the previous conversation didn't happen, or doesn't remember it. She didn't seem concerned for me or my mental health at all, which is good. After a while of general talking about stuff; some shows we like, covid, etc, I got up to use the bathroom. Mary didn't think anything of it, so I slipped down the hall. Before going to the bathroom, I looked down the hall. The kids bedrooms are still there. I tried to open Sandy's room, but it was locked. I didn't want to be caught snooping, so I quickly went to the bathroom and after a few minutes came back out. I still haven't seen Alex. I asked Mary where she was, and she said she went down to see a few of the kids a few streets over. I didn't say anything, but that's a really weird answer, for a couple reasons. It's a small town, but the boys she was talking about are a good 20 minute walk. I honestly cant imagine Alex walking down there by herself, and her bike was still on their front lawn. Any photos on their walls that I remember having the family are now gone. Not edited or anything, fully removed. A few were replaced with photos of Alex, and one was replaced with a painting of a cat, seemingly done by Alex. I'm really starting to get worried here, as any good explanation is gone, and even though Alex still seemingly exists, I haven't seen her in a while. Also, I tried to call the school district to get any information about a Sandy Beckett, but they wouldn't give me anything, since I wasn't a parent/guardian and wasn't on any lists of contacts. Not sure what to do now besides be vigilant and try and talk to Alex. Thanks for all your support, guys, it's really helping out. I'll try to respond to more comments, and hopefully give you guys a better picture of what's going on. &#x200B; **Mini Update/Edit:** I'm seeing alot of comments asking about my parents. Without going into too much of my problems, my mother is dead and my father is god knows where. I live with my grandparents. And as much as I want to say that they'll be able to help me out, I honestly have never known more checked-out people in my life. I could tell them I'm doing meth (im not lol) and they'd just be like "have fun". They don't care much for anything around them. They don't talk to the neighbors, and I know for a fact that they don't talk to the Becketts. &#x200B; update?: someones outside. i've never seen em before theyre just standing in the middle of the road im freaking out. nobody new comes down here especially not at 11 at night. i cant go out i dont want em to see me. I havent seen anybody new down here since that new old guy moved in down the road why is someone here. i dont know this person theyre new im freaking out i cant confront them. im going to the bedroom and baracading myself in this isnt the thing thats takin me out. no ma'am. oh god illl up date when I get a chance and i know its safe fuck &#x200B; uppdate: people are confrsed about my last uodate. callled mary snd she said it was an okd friend whi wasv loiterin cuz she eas lookin for thr rigbt addresss, soeey noo opicture of persodn i panicced, jf she comees bacj ill tfy and remember to grt a picruee . csnt updsate more im si rired. &#x200B; Update: I'm sorry for my sudden disapearance, after the shit I posted, no less. I'm going to be completely honest here, I don't really remember writing the last update, or the post I made to r/Drugs. I'm not sure what all has happened these past few days here, but I do know that at some point I ended up getting sick. Something is wrong with my stomach, and I haven't been in the best physical or mental state. I realized I should probably update, so people don't get worried. In all honesty, i'm just really tired and want all of this to stop. I'm scared about Sandy, and I don't know what all is happening anymore. I havent seen Mary or Alex since the last time I went over there. This isn't exactly a satisfying update, but i'm really tired and hurting all the time, and am frankly getting really tired with being worried about Sandy. Unless i find something I think is proof of something one way or another, whether im losing a few screws, or something did happen to Sandy. I just want to stop and go back to how things used to be. I'm sorry, guys. If anything interesting happens i'll be sure to update. when I get better, i'm going to make an effort to go find Alex, but until then, I need to focus on shaking whatever bug I managed to pick up. &#x200B; Mini Update (not just health, I actually do have something relevant): I'm mostly better now, still a little iffy, but with a bit more time, i'll probably be good as new and ready to keep lookin into this. As for Sandy, I took some of you guys's advice and went on socials to see if I could find anything about Sandy. I'm not going to give out socials (obviously) because I don't want them getting harrassed, especially if all this shit is just in my head. Honestly, I didn't look too hard, but I plan to. So far, theres been nothing of interest. Mary hasn't posted too much on her Facebook as of late, though with the pandemic, its not like theres much to talk about besides politics. I found a picture of Alex up from a few weeks ago, and it looks new, so I'm confident she's okay. Nothing of Sandy. I'm gonna keep looking, as this seems like a good angle. Only problem is theres a lot of posts to sift through to try and find anything about Sandy. I'm nervous though about if I find a picture of her. Should I post it? I feel kinda weird combing through her Facebook looking for pictures of a kid, even more so posting it to reddit. Idk I'm just really tired and need to figure this whole thing out. I'm gonna try to respond to some more people on here, but there's alot of comments, some saying the same thing, so I can't get them all. Thanks for all the support guys. &#x200B; Update/confession: People found a blog. I don't know what else I expected from Reddit, but they found it, and I need to come clean. Not in the way you think, but I have been somewhat lying. OP does not exist. There was no neighbor. No grandparents, nothing. The reason things seem sketchy, is because I tried to do something sketchy. I've seen those compilation videos of "mysteries solved by the internet" and similar titles. I thought if I tried to go about this like it was a current thing, maybe I could finally get some damn closure. I'm not a 17 year old concerned neighbor. My name is Alex Beckett. In 2014 my younger sister Sandy Beckett went missing. I lived in Bronson, Florida. I tried to contact the police, but they didn't care about what some random kid had to say, especially considering I had been driven by my older cousin Jr. He has been arrested at least three times, once for hunting on private property, some bullshit charge about being a public nuisance or something (he was kinda being a prick, but thats what you get from a conspiracy nut) and for something related to the possession of crack, even though I know for a fact he couldn't have had any. So the police weren't exactly inclined to care about me telling them Sandy went missing when I showed up in a beaten up Ford truck with the local conspiracy nut who's known for crack despite only doin weed. They basically told me the equivalent of "Go home, honey, and leave the mysteries for your little games." My mother wouldn't be much help either. She's not exactly what society, or any sober person for that matter, would call a good mother. Frankly, I wouldn't be surprised if she fucking killed Sandy and panicked and somehow got it to stay quiet. I think what worked against me back then was my age, my family, and the fact that my mom never wanted us kids to go out much. Not many people really knew us, despite being pretty tight knit. So as for why I did this, I just wanted some answers. I thought maybe the internet could help me. And before anybody asks why I lied about who I am, would you really have believed me if I had some crazy conspiracy that happened when I was so young? I know it wouldv'e been chalked up to some false memory bullshit. Thats not what happened. You don't forget a sister. I've forgotten alot of things, but damnit I'm not gonna forget Sandy. So I made this more episodic, I guess. Trying to get people interested, so they'd maybe look into this, and help me find answers. only problem is that this is the internet, and nobody takes these kinds of things as real. I've gotten a million comments that this isn't real. Well, bingo, you're half right. I just wanted people to see this, and maybe find some of those crazy internet sleuths to finally find Sandy. I don't even know if she's alive, but I hope she is. Please. I know I haven't been truthful, and i'm sorry. I just wanted to find my sister. I did some dumb things, but I need some closure. All in all, I'm sorry for any upset I may cause, and I'm sorry I lied. I hope that some people will still try and help me. I'll give any information I can to help.

OP I see a lot of people (who I assume are joking) saying things like "you're next", and I just want you to be careful. This is not some grand mystery. Your entire town is not in on this, and you are not at risk because you posted this or inquired about it. If you can't find an answer within the next week, contact a psychiatrist and see if you're suffering from some kind of mental issue. I wish you the best of luck :)

I was watching tv in the living room when my dad walked out of his room. He was walking strangely. I said hi to him and he responded in a weak voice that sounded like he was sick. I thought maybe he was just tired. He went in the bathroom and stayed there for a long time making no sound. I asked if he was ok and he mumbled something. Me and my mom were watching the news and he walks out of the bathroom asking what happened in that weak voice again. I asked him "Is there something wrong with you?" and he said yes. When I asked him what's wrong, he responded I don't know. Me and mom kept asking "What's wrong, why are you acting like that? Is something hurting? Did something happen?" And each time he kept responding "I don't know." My mom asked him how could he not know what's wrong and he bursted out crying "I don't know!" I sat by him on the couch and he wouldn't open his eyes. When I asked him if he was in pain he cried saying "I don't know" again. Then he went back to his room to sleep. Does anyone know what could be wrong with him? UPDATE: I called 911 and EMS came and did some tests on my dad. They said he seems to be healthy but should go to the hospital to make sure. He refused. Guess there isn't anything else I can do. Thankfully he doesn't seem to be having a stroke. He's walking and talking normally now. He said he took about 6 sleeping pills and a powerful muscle relaxer so I guess that could be it. Both my parents are really pissed at me for calling 911 but hey better to be safe than sorry! Thanks for all the responses. CLARIFICATION: I'm getting a lot of comments asking the same questions. My dad has severe insomnia that sometimes causes him to be up for several days. Even the strongest sleeping pills often don't help him. He was prescribed the sleeping pills and muscle relaxer. He didn't take them all at once but over the course of a day. I know my dad isn't suicidal or a drug abuser (except for this instance obviously). Ironically, he's very against any kind of drugs, including prescription, and I often have to force him to take his pills. He probably just had impaired judgement from sleep deprivation. Obviously still very stupid behavior I'll make sure never happens again. People keep saying that he could've had TIA and needs to go to the ER immediately, but since he refuses to go I don't think there's anything I can do. I'll no longer be hesitant to call 911 if something like this ever happens again, but beyond that my hands are tied. I'll be on the lookout for symptoms of a stroke, Alzheimer's, low blood sugar, or any strange behavior from him. Thankfully he's acting completely normal now. Thanks for all the helpful comments and concern.

Your parents are extremely silly to be angry with you for making the correct call with the information at hand. Good for you though OP.

I was assaulted 2 months ago by a male friend and now im pregnant. Abortion is banned where I live and im only 14. Im scared of giving birth and it’s incredibly unfair to me considering I wasn’t even sexually active or anything. Im so scared, I know I can’t be a teen mom and im terrified of dying during labor. I don’t know what to do please, I need advice. Also please don’t try to convince me not to abort it, my emotional state is too shattered for this.

Are your parents people who are safe and would help you with this? If so, they could possibly take you to another state and help you get an abortion.

Hi, I'm a father of 1 and I was at work today. My coworker came to me and she told me a couple was paying their bill and the father was in the back of the store with their baby in the stroller. The baby was crying so he hit her face and said stop crying in a stern tone. I have a sense these people neglect their child from the way they act towards her every month they pay their bill. I have a 1 year old daughter and it hits me a different way now when I see this kind of stuff. I called dispatch immediately after she told me of this so we brought up camera footage and the first time it shows him hit her and then he aggressively gets in her face like he's angry. He's currently in a holding cell, co-worker gave her statement but I don't know how I feel about instigating in the situation. TLDR: Guy hit his baby in the face in my store because she was crying, I called the cops, guys in a holding cell and I don't know how I feel

If he was hitting the baby like that in public, can you imagine what he was doing at home? You did the right thing.

I'm 17 and this feels like my first major loss. I don't know how to handle this. Because of the quarantine, I can't see anybody close to me and my heart aches. I call my girlfriend multiple times a day but it isn't enough. I need to hug someone who isn't my mom or dog. I just don't know how to move forward.

I lost my uncle to it too.. I still try to joke about the virus though because that’s how I personally cope with issues. Sorry tho

My husband of 23 years hung himself last night. We were in the middle of moving houses and he said he was on his way with the truck. We worked all day getting ready and he never came, because he had hung himself at work. Setting aside my own anger and hurt - our daughters 20 and 23 are devastated. We are very close where he was always prone to rage and depression. There were negative feelings and harsh words said,and things were bad in our house for a long time due to his behavior. While keeping safe during this pandemic,what are resources for me to share with my daughters? Any advice is welcome.

Look it's not v much but I design funeral and memorial templates on the side. You are welcome to pick anything you need from my shop and I'll send it to you for free: https://etsy.me/3gtyRC9  Very sorry to hear about your loss. I wish I had something more useful to say.

At my school we have like an award thing at the end of year (like most artistic, best athlete etc..) we didn’t get to have one last year so we did one two weeks ago in November. I usually never get nominated for anything but since it was my birthday in november, I had to go on stage as “birthday boy” which I was really stressful Yesterday my friend found on our school Facebook group (which I was never invited on) that they had “awards” that were mean on the Facebook thing And I was “most likely to stay virgin forever”.. and it really gutted me. I’m gay and and the only experience I have is with a guy I had a crush on forever and he just used me to have fun and when we tried to have sex it didn’t work because I was too nervous and I couldn’t get his penis in.. I wanted to please him so much that I ended up ruining everything I’m just tired of feeling like some piece of trash no one will ever want.. My older brother was really popular so people didn’t dare being too mean to me when he was there but now that he’s gone I feel super alone My mom pays for me to do therapy but it doesn’t really help with anything.. I’m just feeling worthless and hopeless about everything Edit: I don’t think I’ll be able to answer everyone but thank you so much for answering, all of you❤️ Edit 2: It’s a private Facebook group made by students, no school staff knows about this.. and I was not the only victim we were maybe 10 to have shitty categories like that

Dude, kids are just cruel, sadistic assholes. Don't put any value in their toxic behavior. You're in control of your own life. Figure out the kind of person you want to be, and work towards that goal. As long as you are always moving forward and trying to better yourself, then you will be alright. The only way to go wrong is to let other people determine your self-worth.

I have zero stance on religion because it’s not my business. However this church is known for refuting science absolutely, causing members to make bad financial investments and aiding in the spread of misinformation. Currently our county has the highest Covid numbers and deaths in our state. This particular church encourages their members to not wear masks because Satan is a liar. They also force young members that have unplanned pregnancies to come full term and the church pastors keep the babies. There have been several reports of sexual misconduct in the name of the Lord, where one pastor will “heal” you if you preform fellatio. It’s fucking weird. Now that I explained why I bought the domain names, what do I do with them. My first thought was to redirect them to the planned parenthood site but that’s just what I came up with on my drive to work. What do I do now?

I like your idea of redirecting. You're not leaving yourself open to any defamation but it makes a point. Alternatively, a "Useful resources during COVID" page with links to pro-mask resources, how to spot cults and fake healers, etc. Don't make any claims about being/representing the church though.

It happened two months ago, and I'm finally speaking about it. Usually, I'd be too shy to write Reddit posts because I was highly doubtful that I would get any support, let alone sympathy. I accept that I need help and I'm not okay, and it's okay not to be okay. I'm hurting. I'm hurting and alone and scared. I couldn't focus in school, knowing I was the only one left alone now. I only had my mother and my older brother. My dad left us when I was born. This affected me, but I grew up strong with dreams of a better life, which kept me going. My situation growing up was inevitable, but my future was my decision. My family kept me going through it all. I lived in Southern California and attended school not far from my family. However, two months ago. There was a horrible break-in while I was away (Police said). I assume because my family was home.. they thought the best way to get rid of evidence was to set my house ablaze. I'm true. I'm truly devastated. They didn't live in the best area since we all grew up poor, and I can't help but feel guilty that I wasn't there to save them. They patiently waited for me to succeed so that when I started my career, I could take them away from the hell we lived in. Eventually, I stopped going to school and would have panic attacks at my part-time job. I was in a month-to-month where I was staying while I went to Uni, but since I was already living basically on the financial edge (I didn't take any loans out for school), I ended up relinquishing my spot there as well. I'm staying with my cousin, but the living conditions are horrible. He's the messiest, sleaziest person I have ever met, but it's my only shelter. I only have one uncle and aunt, but they didn't like my mom, so they resent me regardless of the situation. There are roaches and ants.. mold on the wall, and I don't feel safe as a woman in this neighborhood, let alone at home. Well. Place. I don't have a home anymore. I need advice on starting over in another state away from this hell. It's hard for me to go outside after the trauma. I don't sleep, and I wake up screaming when I do. I panic when I hear leaves go by outside the apartment, and I'm losing it. Too many memories here. I plan to continue my educational endeavors and work to get a room somewhere; I'm just unsure how to start. I don't know where to look. I don't know who to trust or who to talk to. I'm trying to stay calm and collect myself, but the lack of sleep makes me hallucinate. Please help. Edit: Thank you, everyone, for your loving support. As of 2023, I am proud to say that I have learned to accept what has happened. I am now safe and carrying their spirits with me.

I’m so sorry for your loss. You’re in a very tough position. I live in the southern US and the cost of living here is very low. I have a friend that works at a water testing lab that tests waste water from Appalachia. A bio degree could definitely get you a job like that around here. This area is also very pretty with a lot of opportunities to do things outside. I hope everything works out for you. You’re strong.

Been with my girlfriend for 6 months, things are going well, she does get jealous at times but I think a lot of girls do. Had a vacation booked with my friends since before we met to Cancun. First day I get there and it is crazy hot, I have pale skin so I always wear factor 50 sunscreen so I don’t burn. I was laid out in the sun for about 6 hours, in pool and sea. Didn’t feel burnt, then when I got back to the hotel I started to feel sick and my body was red all over. I was sick and stayed in the hotel that evening In agony, could barely walk from being so burnt. Messaged my girlfriend and said what had happened, I thought the uv was just super intense and I burnt. She replied with the cry laugh emoji 😂 she said that she swapped out my factor 50 and replaced it with factor 2 for a joke. I haven’t spoken to her for 4 days now and am only just recovering from my sunburn and able to walk normally as my legs were very burnt. I am now peeling though. Haven’t left hotel room at all, just had friends bring me food while they went out and partied. Not sure what to do, is this something to break up over or am I overreacting? I feel she did this as she was jealous I’d be hooking up with other girls whilst away from her.

Dump her. Did you know that people can actually die from sunburn? Yeah. It’s true. Anyways, it’s a fucked up thing to do to someone.

I(34f) just quit my job as a nurse at a children's hospital. A little girl(7f) had to be rushed to hospital and ended up having to stay for about a week. She was a sweetheart and I tend to become attached and care a lot about the kids that I help so its really devastating when we aren't able to save the patients if they end up passing. Well sadly this girl unfortunately died and I was heartbroken. I've seen patients die and every time it happens it breaks my heart. I ended up quitting my job because I didn't want to see anymore children die and me being unable to save them. My husband was mad when he heard this saying that having some patients die is just part of the job and that I need to grow up but in all honesty it depresses me more and more every time it happens. What should I do Edit:he knows I have money saved up for situations like this Edit 2: after thinking about it for a few hours I decided to leave him for treating my mental health like its not important

you should take some time off and try to heal, i’m sure that’s pretty traumatic.

So I am a recent college grad with 30 grand in debt. In the last couple of months a lot of bad things happened. I got my backpack stolen from my car, it had my laptop, somebody did a hit and run on my car and I spent money I didn't have to fix it. I lost 1000 dollars in the stock market, I was hoping to double my investments but I miscalculated. I lost my job permanently because of Covid 2 weeks ago, the place I worked closed down for good. The girl I was seeing completely ghosted me out of nowhere last week, everything was going good and she told me she liked me. I liked her a lot and she never responded to my calls or texts, poof out of nowhere. I feel like a complete failure and couldn't sleep last few nights, did I go to college for nothing? Is it even worth living at this point, I really want to jump out of a building but this will make my father and brother scarred for the rest of their lives. I can't sleep, can't eat, everything tastes bitter now. I am really behind on bills and I am living off my credit card. What should I do? I am in tears writing this. Edit- Thank you so much everyone, the kindness I received on this sub brought tears in my eyes. I guess I am not alone. I won't give up and will only move forward

Hi San! If it helps, I’m not using my laptop anymore because I recently purchased a PC. I can mail my laptop to you? You don’t have to send me any money. It’s all yours and I don’t have any need for it anymore. It was temporary for me since my backpack, too, was stolen. I want to tell you that everything will be okay, because things usually are in the end... but there is no telling of when that time will come. If there is any other way you can get a part time or full time job anywhere, maybe you could just to save some money? I’m graduating this semester with a degree that I’m not even interested in pursuing anymore and do feel like college was a waste of time/life. I think we tend to feel that way and accumulate lots of debt because our education system is ass and isn’t free. I wish I could give you a hug!

Exactly the title. A coworker was supposed to "train" me on how to drill a hole in a bent tube. I have manual machining experience and put it to good use on their super janky budget mill. I produced perfect parts. My coworker got angry that i didn't do it "their way" so he tattled on me. I wasn't even aware i was doing something wrong. My boss comes up to me and gets mad that i did it my way and not his way. I grabbed one of the parts done 'his way' at random from a pile. It was fucked up and off center. Mine was flawless. He still tried to turn it around saying i was introducing variation. Mine fit their fucking jig. His did not. He maintains that i did the wrong thing. I'm fucking pissed

I’m a manufacturing engineer and I know, sometimes there are reasons for doing things certain ways that might not be obvious to a machinist or a technician. That being said, there is a right way and a wrong way to correct someone and your boss definitely did it the wrong way.

I've been working for this woman for about a year now, and I had never let her add up my time card, because my trainer had warned me of letting her do it, until last pay period. Last pay period my check was short two hours, it was the first time my check had ever been short. I confronted her and told her, my hours were two hours more than what she had added up on the time card. I showed her how I figured my hours and she told me that she just turned everything into decimals and added them up, like how the pay company told her to do it. However, for 7 hours 30 minutes, she figured 7.3 instead of 7.5. I tried to explain the simple math behind how her figuration was wrong but she assured me she was correct and that she would even ask the pay roll company "PayChex" what was correct. She told me, they told her she was correct. On my time card this pay period I wrote 7.5 for 7 days (52.5) and she said I was doing it wrong and that it needed to be 7.3 for 7 days (51.1). She said she would call again and ask them when she called in pay roll. She again stated that they told her .30 was the correct way to write half an hour in decimal form. So I called "PayChex" myself after work and they said they highly doubted anyone in their company told her that, and that .50 was in fact the correct decimal. My boss is now angry with me, claiming that I'VE been the one swindling money and hours from HER. I'm not the only employee who has felt this way, but I'm the only one that has apparently said anything about it. Please help me, what should I do? (My Boss is the owner of the store I work at) UPDATE: She admitted I was right! and her husband (who is apparently good at math) will be doing payroll from now on.

Jesus Christ. I'm sorry, I shouldn't laugh, but that's hilarious. Does she have a boss you could report this to? This is a serious issue that's causing trouble for the company! If I was in charge of a manager who was responsible for payroll but didn't understand decimals (!!!!!!!) I would want to know about it.

Look, I'm on reddit for like 5 years or so, like every day. Recently I'm into cryptos and having a lot of questions, but each time I post. I'm banned because of karma. Can I for example message mods to make an exeption? EDIT: thank you everyone, you can stop upvoting I think I've reached my initial goal so thanks everyone!

You can transcribe image posts from around Reddit to text at r/TranscribersofReddit, it's not that hard to do, improves accessibility, and people give you karma. Plus they call you "good human", which is surprisingly validating.

&ensp;It's not my intention to offend anyone if I use wrong terminology. This is a throwaway because friends know my account. Excuse any typos, I'm on mobile. I apologize for misgendering in the title, it won't let me edit it. &ensp;I (m22) met Ex (22) a few years ago and we became good friends. When we met he was his assigned at birth gender(f). We started dating a couple of years ago, and things were going really well. Then about a month ago, he announced to family and friends that he was transgender and would like to be addressed by his new, male name and changed his look to something more masculine. He did not tell me he was doing this beforehand, apparently only his best friend since they were little(BF for short) knew this was happening. I was a bit shocked, but after some thought it made sense and I apologized for not recognizing his internal struggle sooner. &ensp;He was excited that everyone of his friends seemed to accept it, as well as family members, and I was happy to see him happier than I ever had before. He mentioned hormone therapy and surgery and how excited/nervous he was. It wasn't until about three days ago that anyone asked me how I felt as his partner, and I didn't say anything because I didn't want to take away from what I felt was his moment. I knew the conversation had to be had sooner than later. &ensp;I took Ex aside and said that I loved him and would be there for him, but if he went through with GR surgery it would be best to break up now. He was understandably upset and I didn't know how else to put it other than "I'm not attracted to men." He seemed to understand, but after I got off work I was met with dozens of messages from BF and a few of mine and his friends calling me a transphobe and doing this when he needed support. Some of my friends even suggested that if I loved him as a woman maybe I'd still be attracted to him as a man, but I don't want to string him along through his transition at the chance our love will overcome my sexual orientation. &ensp;I have no idea what to do about this and asking him to tell his friends to back off has been met with silence. Edit: update in comments UPDATE: Ex has finally responded to my messages and there has been some fallout with the friends who harrassed me. He only learned the full scope of what was going on last night because he had been ignoring messages while a couple of friends (who were not involved in the harrassing) spent the day cheering him up. He made them all apologize but a couple of his friends and BF added that they still don't like what I did, and I understand because I hurt their friend even if I meant well. I still don't think I'll be hanging around the ones who turned on me except for the one who apologized first because she had been told a slightly dramatized version of events (still not sure who had been telling people this version but at this point I just want to drop it.) Ex and I are going to take some time apart which is difficult but necessary to move on, and I hope we can stay friends when he's ready. Thanks again for the support and advice.

I’d say they’re absolutely wrong. And they are implying that being homosexual is a choice. They can’t ask you to suddenly be attracted to men. Maybe they thought your timing was wrong, but I personally think it’s better than dragging him along.

I’m newer to reddit and when I try to comment on a post, it says my comment has been deleted because I don’t have enough karma points. What are karma points and how do you get them?

if people upvote your comments/posts then your karma increases, you'll be able to comment on stuff soon don't worry :)

Hi so I’m (M25) and my sister (F24) left her 6 years old daughter at my place last monday I was supposed to watch her for the afternoon but she just left her there.. My sister has issues, she is immature and only cares about partying and hooking up.. I love her kid and honestly there are times I almost think I should adopt her She has only one outfit, the one she had on Monday and his starting to ask where her mom is.. I went to her place and she was not there.. but we saw her tagged in some insta stories in bars or with friends My boyfriend and I had a little weekend getaway organized that we already paid for, were probably gonna have to bring her and we are happy to but we also wanted it to be a romantic weekend She probably just wanted some time off from her daughter and his probably going to come and pick her up soon but I don’t know when, I don’t have anything to send her to school like her books, her bag, clothes etc.. my boyfriend is going to have to drop her to school in the morning because the bus doesn’t come to our place.. I don’t know what to do UPDATE: My sister just came to pick her up.. She seemed maybe a bit hangover but not high or drunk and the social service lady told me that I have to let her go, especially since my niece was really happy to see her mom, I couldn’t just make a big scene. The report is already made to Social Services, someone is appointed to our case for Monday, I don’t know exactly what is going to happen or what are the steps.. I just went back to the DPJ website and our appartment does not meet all criteria to be a foster family.. But my boyfriend’s parents are willing to take her I talked to a lawyer and we can’t adopt her.. What is most likely to happen is the social services are going to evaluate if my niece has to be fostered (I guess it will be the case) and then my boyfriends parents could be the one to take her for a couple of months. A social worker will assess my sister’s progression and decide if after X number of time she has gotten better enough to take her daughter back in again.. But you can’t just adopt a kid who already has a biological parent if the parent is not totally unfit.. That was my understanding of it but I’m sure there’s more complexity to it Edit: a big big thank you and hug the all those who answered and supported me❤️

**This is not okay.** Your Sister basically just pulled the single-parent equivalent of "going out to buy a pack smokes" and never coming home. I would have grave concerns about the long-term wellbeing of a child being raised by this kind of parent. So what should you do? Well, the first thing is you are going to need to have a sit down, and long conversation with your boyfriend. Because right now, for all intents and purposes, your sister has abandoned this child. And so you and your partner need to decide whether or not you would like to raise this child on your own, as if it were your own. Including 12 years of intensive child-rearing, and a lifetime of parenting. If you do not want to raise this child, try to get into contact with the mother, and consider reaching out to CPS. If you do decide to raise the child, then there are 3 things you will need to do: 1) Get the child some more clothes, and a room in your house, and generally create for them the space that would be needed for them to live with you as a child. 2) Start Building a Legal case for why guardianship should be passed to you for this child (Potentially through adoption). You will probably want to contact a lawyer, and go from there. Your sister may be happy to be rid of the child, as her present actions would indicate, but if she waltzes back in a month after one hell of a bender and wants the kid back... You will need to be prepared to work legally to keep the kid safe. 3) Once you've set the first two things in motion, you are going to need to talk to the kid. This will take place as a series of conversations over their life. You can start with something like "She's going away for a while" or something to that effect, but you will eventually, when the kid is older, probably need to address what happened. It's not going to be pretty, and honestly, I do not feel comfortable as an internet stranger, telling you how to have that talk. *Edit: Misread initially, and missed the boyfriend part. Definitely definitely have a talk with partner in that case, and make sure to reach out to lawyer if want to keep kid*