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PETRUCHIO: I am content. |
KATHARINA: Are you content to stay? |
PETRUCHIO: I am content you shall entreat me stay; But yet not stay, entreat me how you can. |
KATHARINA: Now, if you love me, stay. |
PETRUCHIO: Grumio, my horse. |
GRUMIO: Ay, sir, they be ready: the oats have eaten the horses. |
KATHARINA: Nay, then, Do what thou canst, I will not go to-day; No, nor to-morrow, not till I please myself. The door is open, sir; there lies your way; You may be jogging whiles your boots are green; For me, I'll not be gone till I please myself: 'Tis like you'll prove a jolly surly groom, That take it on you at the first so roundly. |
PETRUCHIO: O Kate, content thee; prithee, be not angry. |
KATHARINA: I will be angry: what hast thou to do? Father, be quiet; he shall stay my leisure. |
GREMIO: Ay, marry, sir, now it begins to work. |
KATARINA: Gentlemen, forward to the bridal dinner: I see a woman may be made a fool, If she had not a spirit to resist. |
PETRUCHIO: They shall go forward, Kate, at thy command. Obey the bride, you that attend on her; Go to the feast, revel and domineer, Carouse full measure to her maidenhead, Be mad and merry, or go hang yourselves: But for my bonny Kate, she must with me. Nay, look not big, nor stamp, nor stare, nor fret; I will be master of what is mine own: She is my goods, my chattels; she is my house, My household stuff, my field, my barn, My horse, my ox, my ass, my any thing; And here she stands, touch her whoever dare; I'll bring mine action on the proudest he That stops my way in Padua. Grumio, Draw forth thy weapon, we are beset with thieves; Rescue thy mistress, if thou be a man. Fear not, sweet wench, they shall not touch thee, Kate: I'll buckler thee against a million. |
BAPTISTA: Nay, let them go, a couple of quiet ones. |
GREMIO: Went they not quickly, I should die with laughing. |
TRANIO: Of all mad matches never was the like. |
LUCENTIO: Mistress, what's your opinion of your sister? |
BIANCA: That, being mad herself, she's madly mated. |
GREMIO: I warrant him, Petruchio is Kated. |
BAPTISTA: Neighbours and friends, though bride and bridegroom wants For to supply the places at the table, You know there wants no junkets at the feast. Lucentio, you shall supply the bridegroom's place: And let Bianca take her sister's room. |
TRANIO: Shall sweet Bianca practise how to bride it? |
BAPTISTA: She shall, Lucentio. Come, gentlemen, let's go. |
GRUMIO: Fie, fie on all tired jades, on all mad masters, and all foul ways! Was ever man so beaten? was ever man so rayed? was ever man so weary? I am sent before to make a fire, and they are coming after to warm them. Now, were not I a little pot and soon hot, my very lips might freeze to my teeth, my tongue to the roof of my mouth, my heart in my belly, ere I should come by a fire to thaw me: but I, with blowing the fire, shall warm myself; for, considering the weather, a taller man than I will take cold. Holla, ho! Curtis. |
CURTIS: Who is that calls so coldly? |
GRUMIO: A piece of ice: if thou doubt it, thou mayst slide from my shoulder to my heel with no greater a run but my head and my neck. A fire good Curtis. |
CURTIS: Is my master and his wife coming, Grumio? |
GRUMIO: O, ay, Curtis, ay: and therefore fire, fire; cast on no water. |
CURTIS: Is she so hot a shrew as she's reported? |
GRUMIO: She was, good Curtis, before this frost: but, thou knowest, winter tames man, woman and beast; for it hath tamed my old master and my new mistress and myself, fellow Curtis. |
CURTIS: Away, you three-inch fool! I am no beast. |
GRUMIO: Am I but three inches? why, thy horn is a foot; and so long am I at the least. But wilt thou make a fire, or shall I complain on thee to our mistress, whose hand, she being now at hand, thou shalt soon feel, to thy cold comfort, for being slow in thy hot office? |
CURTIS: I prithee, good Grumio, tell me, how goes the world? |
GRUMIO: A cold world, Curtis, in every office but thine; and therefore fire: do thy duty, and have thy duty; for my master and mistress are almost frozen to death. |
CURTIS: There's fire ready; and therefore, good Grumio, the news. |
GRUMIO: Why, 'Jack, boy! ho! boy!' and as much news as will thaw. |
CURTIS: Come, you are so full of cony-catching! |
GRUMIO: Why, therefore fire; for I have caught extreme cold. Where's the cook? is supper ready, the house trimmed, rushes strewed, cobwebs swept; the serving-men in their new fustian, their white stockings, and every officer his wedding-garment on? Be the jacks fair within, the jills fair without, the carpets laid, and every thing in order? |
CURTIS: All ready; and therefore, I pray thee, news. |
GRUMIO: First, know, my horse is tired; my master and mistress fallen out. |
CURTIS: How? |
GRUMIO: Out of their saddles into the dirt; and thereby hangs a tale. |
CURTIS: Let's ha't, good Grumio. |
GRUMIO: Lend thine ear. |
CURTIS: Here. |
GRUMIO: There. |
CURTIS: This is to feel a tale, not to hear a tale. |
GRUMIO: And therefore 'tis called a sensible tale: and this cuff was but to knock at your ear, and beseech listening. Now I begin: Imprimis, we came down a foul hill, my master riding behind my mistress,-- |
CURTIS: Both of one horse? |
GRUMIO: What's that to thee? |
CURTIS: Why, a horse. |
GRUMIO: Tell thou the tale: but hadst thou not crossed me, thou shouldst have heard how her horse fell and she under her horse; thou shouldst have heard in how miry a place, how she was bemoiled, how he left her with the horse upon her, how he beat me because her horse stumbled, how she waded through the dirt to pluck him off me, how he swore, how she prayed, that never prayed before, how I cried, how the horses ran away, how her bridle was burst, how I lost my crupper, with many things of worthy memory, which now shall die in oblivion and thou return unexperienced to thy grave. |
CURTIS: By this reckoning he is more shrew than she. |
GRUMIO: Ay; and that thou and the proudest of you all shall find when he comes home. But what talk I of this? Call forth Nathaniel, Joseph, Nicholas, Philip, Walter, Sugarsop and the rest: let their heads be sleekly combed their blue coats brushed and their garters of an indifferent knit: let them curtsy with their left legs and not presume to touch a hair of my master's horse-tail till they kiss their hands. Are they all ready? |
CURTIS: They are. |
GRUMIO: Call them forth. |
CURTIS: Do you hear, ho? you must meet my master to countenance my mistress. |
GRUMIO: Why, she hath a face of her own. |
CURTIS: Who knows not that? |
GRUMIO: Thou, it seems, that calls for company to countenance her. |
CURTIS: I call them forth to credit her. |
GRUMIO: Why, she comes to borrow nothing of them. |
NATHANIEL: Welcome home, Grumio! |
PHILIP: How now, Grumio! |
JOSEPH: What, Grumio! |
NICHOLAS: Fellow Grumio! |
NATHANIEL: How now, old lad? |
GRUMIO: Welcome, you;--how now, you;-- what, you;--fellow, you;--and thus much for greeting. Now, my spruce companions, is all ready, and all things neat? |
NATHANIEL: All things is ready. How near is our master? |
GRUMIO: E'en at hand, alighted by this; and therefore be not--Cock's passion, silence! I hear my master. |
PETRUCHIO: Where be these knaves? What, no man at door To hold my stirrup nor to take my horse! Where is Nathaniel, Gregory, Philip? |
ALL SERVING-MEN: Here, here, sir; here, sir. |
PETRUCHIO: Here, sir! here, sir! here, sir! here, sir! You logger-headed and unpolish'd grooms! What, no attendance? no regard? no duty? Where is the foolish knave I sent before? |
GRUMIO: Here, sir; as foolish as I was before. |
PETRUCHIO: You peasant swain! you whoreson malt-horse drudge! Did I not bid thee meet me in the park, And bring along these rascal knaves with thee? |
GRUMIO: Nathaniel's coat, sir, was not fully made, And Gabriel's pumps were all unpink'd i' the heel; There was no link to colour Peter's hat, And Walter's dagger was not come from sheathing: There were none fine but Adam, Ralph, and Gregory; The rest were ragged, old, and beggarly; Yet, as they are, here are they come to meet you. |
PETRUCHIO: Go, rascals, go, and fetch my supper in. Where is the life that late I led-- Where are those--Sit down, Kate, and welcome.-- Sound, sound, sound, sound! Why, when, I say? Nay, good sweet Kate, be merry. Off with my boots, you rogues! you villains, when? It was the friar of orders grey, As he forth walked on his way:-- Out, you rogue! you pluck my foot awry: Take that, and mend the plucking off the other. Be merry, Kate. Some water, here; what, ho! Where's my spaniel Troilus? Sirrah, get you hence, And bid my cousin Ferdinand come hither: One, Kate, that you must kiss, and be acquainted with. Where are my slippers? Shall I have some water? Come, Kate, and wash, and welcome heartily. You whoreson villain! will you let it fall? |
KATHARINA: Patience, I pray you; 'twas a fault unwilling. |
PETRUCHIO: A whoreson beetle-headed, flap-ear'd knave! Come, Kate, sit down; I know you have a stomach. Will you give thanks, sweet Kate; or else shall I? What's this? mutton? |
First Servant: Ay. |
PETRUCHIO: Who brought it? |
PETER: I. |
PETRUCHIO: 'Tis burnt; and so is all the meat. What dogs are these! Where is the rascal cook? How durst you, villains, bring it from the dresser, And serve it thus to me that love it not? Theretake it to you, trenchers, cups, and all; You heedless joltheads and unmanner'd slaves! What, do you grumble? I'll be with you straight. |
KATHARINA: I pray you, husband, be not so disquiet: The meat was well, if you were so contented. |
PETRUCHIO: I tell thee, Kate, 'twas burnt and dried away; And I expressly am forbid to touch it, For it engenders choler, planteth anger; And better 'twere that both of us did fast, Since, of ourselves, ourselves are choleric, Than feed it with such over-roasted flesh. Be patient; to-morrow 't shall be mended, And, for this night, we'll fast for company: Come, I will bring thee to thy bridal chamber. |
NATHANIEL: Peter, didst ever see the like? |
PETER: He kills her in her own humour. |
GRUMIO: Where is he? |
CURTIS: In her chamber, making a sermon of continency to her; And rails, and swears, and rates, that she, poor soul, Knows not which way to stand, to look, to speak, And sits as one new-risen from a dream. Away, away! for he is coming hither. |
PETRUCHIO: Thus have I politicly begun my reign, And 'tis my hope to end successfully. My falcon now is sharp and passing empty; And till she stoop she must not be full-gorged, For then she never looks upon her lure. Another way I have to man my haggard, To make her come and know her keeper's call, That is, to watch her, as we watch these kites That bate and beat and will not be obedient. She eat no meat to-day, nor none shall eat; Last night she slept not, nor to-night she shall not; As with the meat, some undeserved fault I'll find about the making of the bed; And here I'll fling the pillow, there the bolster, This way the coverlet, another way the sheets: Ay, and amid this hurly I intend That all is done in reverend care of her; And in conclusion she shall watch all night: And if she chance to nod I'll rail and brawl And with the clamour keep her still awake. This is a way to kill a wife with kindness; And thus I'll curb her mad and headstrong humour. He that knows better how to tame a shrew, Now let him speak: 'tis charity to show. |
TRANIO: Is't possible, friend Licio, that Mistress Bianca Doth fancy any other but Lucentio? I tell you, sir, she bears me fair in hand. |
HORTENSIO: Sir, to satisfy you in what I have said, Stand by and mark the manner of his teaching. |
LUCENTIO: Now, mistress, profit you in what you read? |
BIANCA: What, master, read you? first resolve me that. |
LUCENTIO: I read that I profess, the Art to Love. |
BIANCA: And may you prove, sir, master of your art! |
LUCENTIO: While you, sweet dear, prove mistress of my heart! |
HORTENSIO: Quick proceeders, marry! Now, tell me, I pray, You that durst swear at your mistress Bianca Loved none in the world so well as Lucentio. |
TRANIO: O despiteful love! unconstant womankind! I tell thee, Licio, this is wonderful. |
HORTENSIO: Mistake no more: I am not Licio, Nor a musician, as I seem to be; But one that scorn to live in this disguise, For such a one as leaves a gentleman, And makes a god of such a cullion: Know, sir, that I am call'd Hortensio. |
TRANIO: Signior Hortensio, I have often heard Of your entire affection to Bianca; And since mine eyes are witness of her lightness, I will with you, if you be so contented, Forswear Bianca and her love for ever. |
HORTENSIO: See, how they kiss and court! Signior Lucentio, Here is my hand, and here I firmly vow Never to woo her no more, but do forswear her, As one unworthy all the former favours That I have fondly flatter'd her withal. |