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We went fishing some 5 or 8 kilometers off the shore of Lake Malawi. Before we could settle down the lake became very rough to the point of threatening our lives.

When I had to walk along a dark road alone.

When I was travelling by tram, I tripped and fell against the door. I thought that I was going to fall out.

When I was not in a position to control myself. I had said too much and had been cruel with no other than my mother.

When my sister had the opportunity to do some modelling work. And I was quite jealous - later on the photographer decided not to take her photograph, and she was very upset - I felt guilty as a result, almost as if I had caused her to lose her opportunity, by not being genuinely happy for her in the first place.

The first time that I had to go up on the stage to give a speech.

One of the greatest joiy was when I succeded in acquiring a motorcycle through my own efforts.

Last Summer in Italy I was attacked by a dog.It was terrible to feel that untidy dirty dog against my naked skin.

Watching a TV documentary on seal clubbing.

I was away to school (Primary). In my abscence my young brother at home got sick suddenly. My parents took him to hospital. On the way he died. It came to me as a sad, sudden and shocking news and I felt very sad.

This also happened when I was very small. I was beaten up by my mother for no fault of mine, I had just beaten up my younger brother for what I thought was his fault. I was very angry with my mother.

When I played in a chess championship, I was disturbed by other people. I asked them to be quiet, but in vain.

First public speaking.

My mother had for some time been trying to separate me from a good friend who, she thought, was not good company for me. Finally, at breakfast one day, we had an argument and I tried to defend my friend.

I was biking with my boyfriend, the sun shining after a long period of bad beather, afterwards we spent the evening and night together.

When my sister broke my china tea set.

I was coming home in a taxi with a fellow worker of mine. He was criticizing my earlier conduct towards him, which to my mind was unfounded. When I reached home, I ran out of the taxi and slammed the door.

I forgot to zip up my trousers, this was not noticed by anyone.

When I was young I stole something from a shop and got caught, then I was taken to the police station and my parents had to come and get me.

[ I would classify subjectively, a certain gesture or the way of talking of a person as disgusting or inacceptable.]

When a boy put a handful of cooked potatoes down my dress and there was no water to clean up.

I finished my homework

My friend told me in a fairly loud voice the blunders she committed last night.

When my father shouted at me for going to a party with my sister.

Doing poorly on a midterm.

I had not done my assignment seriously. I only pretended to finish the work as the work did not have any meaning for me. The whole thing made me feel guilty.

When I saw a woman subjugated by money and not being able to hide how she hated herself for not having the will power to get out of such a situation because it was convenient, according to what she told me.

When I was a child my parents caught me with a pornographic magazine.

I made friends with a classmate whose behaviour I did not like - he tried to flatter other people and did not respect me.

There was a time when my room looked terribly untidy; just at that time my aunt came to see me; fortunately I could prevent her from entering the room.

One day, when I was sitting on the bus, there was an old woman standing beside me. I was very tired and sleepy and did not think of giving her my seat. A 50 year old woman who was sitting beside me got up and gave her seat to the old woman and said, " Old woman, please take my seat, the youngstters these days are not used to giving their seats to others." When I heard these words I was very ashamed of myself and wanted to get off the bus at once.

My parents told me that they do not like my friend.

I thought that the guy I had been associating with for over a year went out 2 or 3 times with a high school girl whom he claimed not to like.

In the tram there was a fat, sickly looking woman in front of me who was asking for directions in a thick voice. When she got up to go a disgusting smell of urine came from her. I felt that I would choke.

I think that I am rather shy and do not mix with people as I would have liked to, out of shyness.

I was walking on a street alone in the afternoon when there were not too many people on the street. A couple of guys were following me and I was ignoring them. Suddenly one of them came in front of me and started using dirty language and harrassing me. I got very angry and wanted to strike back at them.

I was travelling in a local train when a drunkard, smelling terribly, entered the same carriage and started eating fish that was stinking.

I had a quarrel with my father, because I was of the opinion that he decided in an authoritarian way which TV program we should watch. I became very angry and started throwing things through the room.

I am ashamed at myself sometimes when I am working with handicapped people and don't wish to be seen in public with them.

I thought him a good friend but he tried to lie to me several times. Last time was the height of impudence. He promised he would come home but he didn't. I felt a sense of anger and insult.

My older brother who gives me unwanted advices about problems in my relationship with my girlfriend.

My parents scolded me a lot for something I had not done. It was my sister who had done it.

When I went to report a stolen good at the police station, the woman-officer-in-charge was very rude and did not seem to have respect for anyone.

Students on campus were unnecessarily creating trouble just to heckle the authorities - not to achieve something concrete, but to further their own interest.

I felt something close to that when I saw that there was a man on the terrace of the flat.

One day my elder brother badly scolded my father. This was the first time that I heard such abusive language from my brother. I requested him humbly not to use this kind of language but he did not care for what I was saying. Finally I picked up an axe to use against him, in the meanwhile people intervened.

When I was a little girl about eight years old I broke the bey from a closed. Mother asked who did it. I said that it wasn't me, as I almost never lied, and my brother did it more frequently in spite my brother denieing it my mother gave him a few slaps.

When I promised to help a friend over a weekend and did not keep the promise.

Something was stolen.

A sense of guilt I felt once when I couldn't defend the confidence my teacher had in me and thus discrediting him at a concert.

I criticised an action of my mother and for the first time she genuinely took notice of it. I felt shame that I was almost taking the part of a husband, or at least an equal which I should not.

I was driving very fast on a small road and I met an oncoming car in a right handed bend. The other driver was on his own side of the road and I had to skid out of it to avoid a collision. It was dark.

When I cancelled an appointment with an idle story. Afterwards it appeared that the person had looked forward to it and reserved time for it.

I read a book whose plot and expressions were obscene and in very bad taste.

When I was ten years old a classmate laughed at me because I had told him that my father had retired.

When I saw President Reagan get elected.

I threw away an object, which belonged to a friend, because I did not know what to do with it. My friend was very sad about that and I felt guilty.

When I was accepted at UNZA.

A certain woman had asked me to make something for her and I kept putting it off. When I finally made it, I did not see her for days only to be told one day that she had collapsed and died. I felt quite guilty as she had jokingly said that I might not do what she had requested me to do.

Because I had not studied.

When I was 12 years old, some friends of our family had come to watch TV. I lay on the floor and moved my pelvis. When the other people had gone, my mother told me that it had looked as if I had wanted to make sex.

When a close friend wilfully cheated me.

The moment I got the news that I had been selected for the U.G.C junior national research fellowship. It was a dream come true.

I felt joy when I passed my Malawi School Certificate of Education.

When I did not give back a text book to a friend in time.

The cat of my landlady escaped through the window which I had left open.

When I went to meet the family of my boyfriend in a party in his house. His mother was eager to know me and all his friends ready to make jokes about the situation.

Someone I know and respect sexually assulted a girl.

My boyfriend had drunk too much and beaten me. When I had to show the letter the door, which was almost crashed, I felt ashamed.

When I masturbated in my room.

One of my best friends'fiancT broke off the relationship because his feelings for me were stronger than for her. I felt the same for him, but did not really encourage him to leave her or stay with her - still felt shame.

When I forgot the lyrics during a song contest.

When I met a very close friend of mine after one year of separation.

I worked with several classmates on a project. I was very anxious about the project while my partners showed no concern and when we had meetings on the project my classmates did not pay any attention. Some of them read books while the others argued on irrelevant questions. The meeting would go on for two hours without the main theme being discussed. We wasted time and could not reach a compromise. My classmates avoided doing the work and the responsibilities, they seemed to value other projects more than this one.

My dog of 16 and 1/2 years - "Lord Grey" died in his sleep - His death caused me more and deeper sadness than I thought.

When I went to my room-mate's drawer to see if she had an iron which I could use, she came in. I felt guilty as she may have thought that I had been stealing.

The dying of a close member of the family.

When I scored the third goal to my own side at a football match against William Murray Secondary School and we were badly defeated.

I asked someone to go out and she accepted right away.

Watching a horror film.

When my new jeans split while I was with the youth group.

When I met my mother after not having seen her for three years.

During the funeral of my grandmother, when I saw my mother and other family members crying.

I promised to join a meeting but did not turn up as I did not want to do the work.

Comments from other children on my alcoholic father

I and my cousin went to a filmshow at night. We went without making it known to my mother. While we were there at interval, I came across my mother just close to where we sat.

I felt disgusted on seeing my boyfriend after our separation. One day he was begging at the mass transit railway station and at that moment I hated him.

Every time I do not write something well in English.

I wanted to be pregnant and did not succeed, so I was depressed at every menstruation.

After much trouble getting together in the first place my boyfriend and I celebrated our first anniversary.

Winning a race that I had been training for, for many weeks. (Running Race).

When I was with a girl who seemed to love me, while I was with her just to go to bed with her.

I forgot my mother's and sister's birthdays (they fall on the same day).

I felt guilty when I lost K43 for my friend when he was arrested.

My elder sister forced me to do a few things which I did not like to do.

I felt guilty because I stole some sweets from my father's grocery. When he asked me who stole the sweets I told him it was my brother who stole the sweets and he was scolded.

A night spent with a group of friends.

When a soppy poem that I had written to a boy was found and every one read it and started teasing me about it.

At hostel, my roommate was a very selfish person and would avoid doing anyhting that did not concern him. A few of us prepared lunch together and had decided to share the work. My roomate had promised to do the same but I had to wash the bowls everytime after dinner. I tried to wait and thought that he would realize his fault. I did not want to tell him to do the work as he is a university student and ought to have self-respect. He disappointed me and so every time I saw him I tried to avoid him and did not want to keep any contact with him.

When a friend told me a story and I stayed dumb because I had no story to tell.